Interesting

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=86dsfBbZfWs 


My sister sent me this "information" from a youtube placement.  I found it very interesting and yet, another thing came up to mind when i saw it.  


I agree with the "theory" that life is short and eternity is forever.  Yet, I am a realist for the most part. We still have to exist in this world.  We still have to deal with issues.  We are still concerned when things happen.  We cannot forget this life, we just have to manage to live in it.  


Look to eternity, but please don't tell me to forget this life even with the shortness of it in relation to the after life.  I have issues I have to deal with every single day.  I have it pretty easy in relationship to others I have met.  


Just dealing is hard and frustrating at times, especially when it doesn't seem like it's getting better no matter what you do.  And, to the person who posted the youtube "sermon, " Please forgive me while I try to live DAILY.

Unofficially Official

After talking with my doctors office this AM, I am tentatively scheduled for surgery on September 7. I was hoping for sooner but the doctor is off the whole month of July. He only does surgery on Fridays and there are already scheduled surgeries during August. Unless someone cancels, the first opening is September.

I will go into the hospital on the 6th for tests and have the surgery on the 7th. I can't say I'm looking forward to the surgery, but I AM looking forward to the positive results. I am still having TIAs and AFIB, but so far I haven't gone back to the hospital. Not because I haven't needed to go, but I hate going there.

It's not the hospital personnel; they have been great. I can have all sorts of symptoms to the point of death, but as soon as I walk through the ER doors, I AM HEALED. No symptoms; no pains; nothing shows up in the testing. Those are magical doors. I don't know how they do it, but it is certainly miraculous.

As of right now, Ween and I are holding down the bed. I still have some vertigo which makes moving interesting. If I don't try to do anything, I'm okay. She is taking herself to the potty and for the most part, ok. She has a short attention span, so we have to be careful and "FOCUS" on the task.

Once again, we wait. I'm excited to see our new house God is giving us.

No surprises

After talking with my cardiologist's PA, Marsha, the Ablation procedure is being scheduled, even as we speak.  My "ECHO" was good - no abnormal blood flow; but, enlarged upper left chamber and enlarged bottom right chamber.  She said this is not unusual for people with high blood pressure.

Cardiac ablation is a procedure that is done in order to destroy areas in your heart that may be causing heart rhythm problems. Small wires called electrodes are placed in the heart to measure the electrical activity and destroy the problem areas.

It is being scheduled for happening in about 2 weeks.  I will be in the hospital about 5 days.  I am having the procedure at Arnold Palmer - ORMC (Orlando Regional Medical Center).  Not my usual hospital, but great reputation for "cutting edge" procedures.  (No pun intended)

My doctors have a 90% success rate and do not anticipate any problems.  As I look at it, it is a WIN/WIN situation.  If it happens and works, I win.  If it happens, and something might go wrong, I also win.  I am ready to do almost anything to feel better again.  Hopefully, after this, I'll be able to exercise and lose weight.

I'll blog about the procedure as we go along.  God is good; Yeah, God.

WAHOO

"He's" home.  I'm home.  No pain.  Doctors to see.  Visits to make.  Wahoo.

YESTERDAY

It was not one of my favorite days, to say the least. After having my AFIB since Sunday, I was exhausted and trying to sleep.  Ween decided it was time for me to get up, but not her.  I saw myself staying in bed, but after thrashing about for 30 minutes or so, I decided to get up and get ready for the day by taking a shower.

It's always a "tossup" for me to decide what to do about the irregular heart beat.  It usually returns to "normal" after a few hours.  I have additional medication to help, but nothing seemed to work and it had been three days.  I took my shower and walked five feet into my closet to get something to wear. The next thing I remember is coming face to face with the carpet in my closet. Interesting.

"He" has had a kidney stone since Thursday and the pain had not subsided.  He called to discuss the next step.  We decided we would "both" go to the ER. (The family that gets ill together...)  I had several "episodes" of weakness while en route to our "familiar" local ER.

I found out my heart rhythm had returned to normal; my episodes had subsided; and, I can't take hot, hot showers any more.  According to the "expert" at the hospital, the extreme heat of the shower makes the blood vessels constrict and lack of oxygen can make you pass out.  Hummmmm.

I was released; He was admitted.  Precautions warranted additional tests for him.  I was going home and get some rest.  Backed the car out of the space, ready to buzz home, and heard the familiar "THUMPING" of a flat tire.  (Icing on the cake.)  Finally decided to have it towed to his tire place, called Mock to come to get me, and waited.  And, waited.  And, waited.

The tow truck arrived; Mock had not.  It had been 45 minutes.  We live approximately 15 minutes away.  The tow truck man  (He had to have cash) took the "limping" vehicle away.  Still no Mock.  He was dealing with our cities "finest."  61 in a 45.  I suddenly felt a large drop on my shoulder and after 5 more, there was a deluge from the sky.  I was soaked through all my clothing by the time I got back to the ER drop off area.  And, still no Mock, and no cash. (Is God trying to tell me something?)

Twenty minutes later, Mock showed up with all his paperwork, and we were off to the credit union to get a check cashed that I had received in the mail. Traffic was heavy as we made it to I-drive, got money, had to get gas, and finally made it to the car, paid the poor tow man, and arranged to have the tire fixed.

It was after 2, and we were both starved.  Tried to drive through Mickey-Ds, but it was torn up for remodeling.  Had to drive about 10 miles away. "Megan" from the tire store called.  He had a "razor blade" in the tire.  Not fixable. She assured me that she would work her magic and get us a good deal.

I was TOTALLY wiped.  We headed for home, food, and Ween. After consuming appropriate amounts, I felt the bed calling my name.  Ween and I woke up about 6.  I had to go to Charles' and get some things, then we headed back to the hospital. (Ween didn't go.)

Julie and Bret were there and we stayed until "they kicked us out."  Mock went to get the car and I sat down on a bench beside a black lady wearing a lovely red dress.  I did what I do best, I started talking.  She had been there all day with her son, Steven, 41, who was experiencing some problems with the stent of his dialysis tube and had an infection.

I listened as she explained Steven's situation.  He has been on dialysis 10 years and gone through so much during that time.  He's on "the list" for a new kidney, but no hint as to how long.  Her last words to me, as I got up to get in the car, "Keep the faith."

God has a way of jerking me up short.  Reality is - my day could have been a lot worse.  In perspective, I was grateful for just a "kidney stone."

AHHH/ C0LLEGE LIFE

Trevecca College (Now University) is the college that I went to for the first year+ of higher education.  I was older than the "regular" students as I worked 3 years after high school.  My loving "emotional" parents, Marie and Darrell, gave me the money for my first quarter's tuition.  My biological "father" told me I was too stupid to go to college, and would not support me in any way.

Arriving the day before the Summer Session started, I was able to take a class, and stay in the Senior Dorm.  It was a dream come true.  I was finally "somewhere else."  Wonderful, crazy times and I got to explore the college without the hoards of other students.  I devoured all I could and basked in the glow of learning.  I thought I had died and gone to heaven, especially inside the new Library building.  I have always loved learning.

On my 22nd birthday, July 12, I received a call.  I think it was Susan, but I can't be definite.  (Not important anyway.) My brother, Charles, was missing. He had been taking his final tests in Yokohama to receive his pilot's license. He was a missionary in Japan, traveling quite a bit for the church, and decided flying would be easier and quicker.

The authorities "thought" he had crashed in the water surrounding the area, but he had not been close enough for that kind of "ditch."  His airplane was found on July 15, his daughter's birthday, broken apart on the side of one of the mountains.  Everything during the next few days is a blur.  I remember being at the church for his service, but not much more.  

Charlie, to me, was the ultimate brother.  I thought he could walk on water; so smart he made mostly A's in college; and, knew everything.  I remember being numb; going through the motions of talking with people, and yet trying to avoid everyone.

He was cremated in Japan and his ashes were placed in a niche in a garden there.  At the time, they did not embalm nor bury bodies; not enough land. His wife and children came back to the US, without him.  I know they are remembering him today, just as I remember Tom on April 7. My best wishes and prayers are focused on them today.  

Change - One thing for sure

Didn't make Konas.  "He's" still in pain.  We decided to postpone it until next week-end, or whenever.  It's always a special occasion when we get together, so we will celebrate then.

Vicki dropped by last night.  She was on her way home.  Chloe and Ween played, Vicki worked on my bike, and I watched.  I'm getting really good at that, and of course, holding down the couch.  I need Chloe to come over more often,  She wore Ween down.  That's the most exercise she's had in a long time.  Ween was so tired that she went to bed directly after she ate and didn't get up until this am.

Nothing planned for today.  More resting.  I had some twinges in my back yesterday.  Picking up Ween is a chore and I guess I shouldn't be doing it.  I'll try to be more careful about HOW I lift her.

Only tomorrow will we know whether we can go to church or not.  I hope all "He" needs is rest. We'd like to go, but we'll see.

I'm not sure how I feel about the new pastor.  I've heard him preach and he's just okay.  New pastor has changed the Acapella Service to include instruments too.  And, starting next week, we're going to a 9:00 service instead of 8:45.  I know 15 minutes isn't much, but it's still a change.  Like I said, I don't know yet.  We'll see.  I'm not opposed to change per se, but I really enjoy Acapella music.  For me, the instruments are too loud and hurt my ears.  I have almost stopped going to concerts for the same reason.  Even the ear plugs don't help.  They cut out the noise, but also the music.  I guess I'm turning into an old "poop head."  Interesting turn of events, hummm?

Home

Finally home. Charles drove but I don't think he really felt like it. He's still in pain but should subside soon.

We're celebrating tomorrow w/all the family at Kona Cafe. I really like their food, but it's expensive. Julie's choice. Works for me.

My "Saran Wrap" missed me. Bob used to say I was her food source but I think it's more than that. She's so spoiled and likes things her way. I think it's more that and some love thrown in. I miss her when I'm gone.

I have another appt tomorrow to start therapy. I can't actually exercise until next week because of my back procedure but I'm really looking forward to it. My back pain is gone so I think this will work now. Still having a problem breathing but hope to get that under control soon.

Can't wait to celebrate.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME

Being at MAYO at 8:30am is quite a task in itself. That means we have to get up at 4:00am and be on the road by 5:00.

We arrived and hit the ground running, as they say. It was an extremely full day of appointments - MRI, bloodwork, drs to see, procedures to have. We left about 4:00 pm, and headed for the closest Red Lobster. I got to choose and coconut shrimp sounded good; it was. We left the restaurant to come back to our hotel. (another part of my birthday present - staying over night on the beach.)

I had made arrangements to have dinner at Aida's but I was so totally drained that I begged off. She is so sweet and so are the boys. I hate to have missed them. It's a good thing we didn't go because "My driver" suddenly experienced intense pain and we had to go back to Mayo ER and spend another 3 1/2 hours determining he had a kidney stone.

Not exactly how I planned to celebrate, but he got the medications he needed and is now sleeping for the first time in approx 21 hours. ENOUGH SAID? HAPPY HAPPY.

Thelma and Louise

Kali called yesterday and has ANOTHER "wonderful idea." She is "an idea man" if there ever was one.  The truth be told, some of them are actually pretty great.  Others - not so much.  I'm not sure which this one could be.

Her counselor has told her of a RETREAT type spa that is close to us, provides 21-28 day programs that help with weight loss, depression, and wellness issues of any kind.  She assures me that Medicare pays for it, we can go and stay as long as we want up to 28 days, be on a strict regime, rest and relax, and participate in group activities, and counseling.  I even called Barb and suggested it to her.  "He" thinks its a good idea; so does Mock.

It is for only 28 days.  It does sound like a good plan.  I do need help in a lot of areas.  I'm thinking seriously about doing it.  She says she wants to go for the month of August.  The only problem I see is that Kali has a very short attention span and by next week, she might be on to something else "interesting."

We have been cohorts in many escapades.  We taught together for several years and retired about the same time, both due to health issues.  We both remarried, and she's already divorced.  We both have sons and are outspoken, even if our opinion isn't solicited.  Yes, a lot in common.  I always end up saying, "It's another fine mess you got me into Ollie."  I hope that's not the case this time.  And, whatever will Ween do without me?

Life is so Daily

This week has again been a roller coaster of emotions and appointments.  Up and down; date changes; miscommunications.  I returned the heart monitor on Monday.  Tuesday I began having the "dancing" motion but it didn't last long, thank God.  Maybe the Coumadin is working.  Celebrated the 4th by watching TV and petting Ween.

I had my blood check yesterday and it was 2.3.  That definitely is good.  Tania was happy; the lab tech was happy; Ween was happy.  All was good.  Had to change several appointments with Tania, as our schedules are overlapping for the next few weeks.  Did not get the results of my ECHO.  According to Drs office, it hasn't been processed yet.  It's a good thing I'm not dying or anything.  It was done on the 29th.  Two weeks seems a long time to get it processed, but what do I know.

I had an appointment to have bloodwork done this morning.  Left late, got there with just a script, but it was the wrong one, so I had to cancel that one and reschedule for Tuesday.  Nothing available on Monday.

I have several appointments for MAYO on Wed.  I hope this will be the help I'm looking for with my back.  I am also having an MRI, and see a cardiologist.  I hope to see Aida again.  I miss seeing her, and the boys.

I have a pile of paperwork on my table and need to take care of it.  Some day when I'm rich, I'll have a secretary to take care of that stuff.  Dream on, Sheila.

 

Heart Beat

Friday was the "ECHO" at my cardiologist office.  I wore a heart monitor for 24 hrs after - until 3 on Saturday.  I had two extra heart beats during that time so I indicated it on the machine.

Experienced another TIA on Sunday.  It wasn't as bad as the last one so the Coumadin must be working.  I was taking a shower and when I got out I felt it coming on, quickly got dressed and reached the bed in time to lay down without falling.  Mary happened to be here so she was standing by in case I needed to go to the hospital.  It slowly subsided but there were "after shocks" so I laid still for a few hours.  By then, I was still feeling the vertigo but was able to talk.  Mary insisted I needed to eat.  I usually have nausea during this time, but the food seemed to help.

I had a very hot shower.  I don't know if that brought it on or what did exactly but I'm beginning to sense the signs and can usually get to a chair or couch before it is full blown.  I had the vertigo most of the day and couldn't go to church, but the "episode" was several hours after the vertigo started.

Interesting, huh?  I go back to MAYO on July 11.  More tests.  I am also seeing another cardiologist there.  Dr Dorcher arranged it for me.  He thought there was not enough being done from the signs I described.  He's a sweetheart. He actually cares for his patients.

I've started another blog.  This is creative musings from my "distracted" brain. I generally do "stream of conscienceness" writing; some of it will not make sense to anyone but me.  I've been encouraged to write, so here I go.

One More Time

During this tropical storm Debby, my son drove me to Jacksonville.  Three hours later we are at the Lab, doing Dr ordered blood work in the Davis Building.  ("He" has been so gracious with his time.  I do appreciate him and all he does for me.)  Once again, plans go awry.

After labs, we head for the Mayo building with him pushing me in a wheel chair.  We check in on the 1st floor, move to the 5th floor and are told that they aren't ready for me until 12:30.  It is now 10:30.  They advise that we can go eat.  The cafeteria is back in Davis building.  He wheels me back over to Davis, I eat.  He just had something to drink.  Afterward, we have to traipse back across the campus to the Mayo building.

We arrive at the 5th floor waiting area at approximately noon, and settle down to wait again.  As I have said, Mayo is very exacting with their scheduling.  Today was no exception.  At 12:30 the nurse comes out, takes me back into the procedure rooms area and I undress and put on the "fashionable" procedure wear.  And, I wait.

Donna, the assigned nurse, came back into the "holding" area and sits down in the other chair.  "I see you are taking Coumadin.  When did you stop your medication?"  I didn't know what she was asking.  I HAD NOT stopped the pills. "We have a slight dilemma."  My thought was "We who Paleface?" (Old joke)

She asked if Dr Dorcher had advised me to stop the meds.  I said if he did I had not remembered. They can't do the procedure while I am taking the meds, and my cardiologist must "sign off" on the procedure.  (Someone at Mayo had dropped the ball.)  Sooooooooo, basically we made a six hour trip to have blood work done.  And, they had not even included the PTINR test to check the clotting level.  It's time to head for home.

Back to Jacksonville

Sounds like a country-western song; if not already available, I think I'll write it.  Blood work and a procedure for my back; so much fun.  "He" is taking me. This is supposed to relieve the pain I'm having.  Dr talks surgery, but I don't want that unless it is the VERY LAST option.

It is a total day of fasting tomorrow.  I don't really mind that so much as I do waiting.  Mayo isn't as bad as most places.  They usually stay to a strict schedule and minimal waiting is their directive.  I like my doctors there.  They actually seem to care.

Wed is "blood check" day with my regular GP.  And, then on Friday, I'm back to my cardiologist for more testing.

My life seems to exist just to see Drs.  Although they are extremely capable and kind, I'm really over the "thrill" of the visit.  To me, its like eating the same meal 3 times as day, 7 days a week with no changes in the menu.  I still haven't been able to get to the PT that is waiting for me.  I'd really like to do that.  It probably will help more than anything else.

I would love to get into the water again.  It has rained so much, it is not only hard to get into our pool between storms, but the water is also too cold to use it.  The temperature of the water adversely affects my over all body temperature.  It needs to be at least 80 degrees for me to be able to tolerate it.  It would be nice to have solar heating available.

Today is another day of holding down the couch.  Ween and I have already "assumed" our positions.

Good News; Bad News

Once again supporting the AMA - the doctor "de jour" was my cardiologist. The "echo" showed an enlarged upper chamber on one side.  I am still having the "afib" problem so he is once again increasing the meds.  I am to go back next Friday to see if there is any change and to have another echo.  If not, surgery is recommended.


If we have to go the surgery route, it is a procedure called Ablation:


In cardiac ablation, doctors insert thin, flexible tubes (catheters) with electrodes on the tips into a blood vessel in your arm, groin or neck and thread them through your blood vessels to reach your heart. Doctors then apply heat (radiofrequency energy), a laser or extreme cold (cryoablation) through the catheters to destroy (ablate) abnormal heart tissue causing your heart rhythm disorder  (from Mayo Clinic website)


It is, once again, a wait and see game.  I think that is worse than actual procedure.  I find it much easier to be a patient than being a fixture in the waiting room.  


The President is visiting the Magic Kingdom - EVERYTHING SHUTS DOWN for his visit.  Traffic, parks, and various sundry areas.  It is such a mess when he visits.  I hope he likes the weather.


Ween and I are watching the clouds roll in with the beginnings of a storm coming closer and closer. I love storms. Oh not out in it, but watching the fierceness and presence of God.  Living on a preserve, it is awesome to see the lightening skip across the water, trees bending to the pressure of the wind, and the large, hard raindrops that are released by the dark clouds. Ween is fine with watching it from inside; outside, not so much.  Right now she is ignoring all the signs of the outdoors.  Sleeping is a hard job; but, someone has to do it.

Four Days In Hell

Probably the most frustrating thing about my "four days in hell" is once again being misunderstood.  It has been a reoccurring theme throughout my life. And, yes, it still makes me angry. Maybe I don't make myself clear. Maybe I am trying to give too much responsibility to others.  Either way, that's what had transpired and landed me at "The Farm."

I had to have someone unlock the bathroom door for me.  Permission to bath is also required.  Eating and "group" meeting times are rigidly dictated.  There are absolutely no electronics allowed.  They search your room and belongings all through the day.  And, a really big AND, I miss Ween.

I didn't have anyone to "lick" me awake, if I could finally sleep.  I didn't have to stumble around trying to let someone go outside.  I didn't even have someone to share my food.

Yesterday I "got" to see the Grand Pooba (Psy Dr)  He determines if someone can leave.  He sees me for all of three minutes and he can evaluate my competency?  POWER. It's a wonderful thing.  You have no power or opinion there.  You are a face that moves in front of a body.

I have been blessed to be able to travel.  Tijuana, other border towns, Paris' train station, an interesting shop in Israel.  I guess I was surprised about the facilities - mold in the shower, shower curtain is fall down, window blinds broken, floors dirty to name a few things.  On the positive side, there was hot water for a shower, I have clean linens (uniforms) to wear.  And, don't get me started on the uniforms that "the guests" must wear. Plain street clothes for the staff, and paper blue scrubs for those not yet admitted.  All possessions are taken away and stored "somewhere."  You are supposed to get them back when you check out.

Food is edible up there on 4 W; not so much in the "holding" area.  It took approx 14 hours to get admitted. I had to stay in two different areas before finally moving up to the fourth floor. They did have bag lunches in that area. I'm not sure how they could improve those except by adding a cafeteria. It's a bag lunch.

Cameras are all over.  I even had one in my room.  It's supposed to be because of my heart condition.  My room mate is interesting too.  About 14-16 and sometimes acted like she was 4 or 5.  She screams on a level almost out of normal hearing range.  She's required a "handler" most of the time.  They gave her a shot the first night and she slept after that.

Short of being in an arena at a sporting event, the noise level raises to a slight roar.  My day is usually very quiet and like it this way.  It is indigenous to an ant farm with super bowl speakers on crack.  The walking dead in the halls have blank looks on their faces.  There is also laughing for no apparent reason, screaming, shouting at invisible targets.  Medicated or need meds, I don't know.  I just know my TOTAL goal is getting out.

UNTITLED

I am greatly upset at the "misunderstandings" that people have recently made .


IF YOU HAVE CONCERNS ABOUT ME, DO NOT CONTACT ANOTHER MEMBER OF MY FAMILY TO FIND OUT ABOUT ME.  


Kindly contact me.  Or, better yet.  Keep your concerns to yourself and discuss them with God.  He knows what is going on and doesn't fault me or misunderstand me.


I am old enough to make my own decisions and really do not appreciate anyone's input unless I ask for it.  


This is all I have to say about the matter - If you don't like what I write, don't read it.

TIRED

Anyone who has kept up with me, knows how my life has been spiraling. As I told my doctor, "I am sick and tired of being sick and tired."

I have tried to do what is right.  I have tried to hold it together.  I am too tired to try any more.  Please don't make a big deal out of this.  I know things are constantly changing, but they have not changed for the better in the last 10 years.  I'm too tired to fight any more.

Please forgive me.



(An excerpt from a story in the writing stage by Sally Kirk.)

Practicing Medicine

You realize, of course, doctors are just "Practicing" medicine.  Every time I go to another office; every time I wait in a crowded noisy waiting room; every time I have to get weighed I try to imagine my life without doctors.  I wouldn't have any place to go or have expectations of wonder over what is their diagnosis.  My life would be so boring.

I'm being referred to another doctor to have an "Echo" done; meds have been changed again at both places today; and, blood was checked for clotting level - 3.7 - a little high so we're changing that too.  Where would I be without my doctors.

I stopped at the store and got dinner.  Mock was off today but had to do the doctor thing too. He's still on restricted duty so he's back in a park tomorrow. He is going to "sweat" again.  I remember those days.  That was one of the reasons I changed for an inside job - heat, sweat, sun poisoning, all those good things.  He can hardly wait.  I'm sure he will have several "scenarios" to tell me about.  Oh what a day.

Canada is North, Right?

Canada is north and Mexico is south.  Seems simple enough, right?  "He" has made it to Canada from Kalispell.  Now for the next leg of his trip.  This is officially business now. Everyone in my family went to Canada one summer. I have never been.  I would love to have been included in this trip, but alas. (You know my song of woe.) I'm not sure where "He" goes from Calgary, but I'm sure it will be a great trip.

Doctors appointments on Wed will keep us busy.  I have two; Mock has one. We believe in supporting the AMA. At this point in life, I haven't much choice. Still trying to get things straightened out so I can start my PT.  My heart doctor on Wednesday will be able to advise me more.

Dr Dorcher, at Mayo Clinic, wants me to see their Cardiologist.  I tried to get an appt for several weeks and they said they were booked.  He got me in to see one the middle of July.  In the meantime, we are still testing and whatever needs to be done.

Mock is on "light" restricted duty due to his injured thumb.  He's at Epcot today, and off Tues and Wed.  He is supposedly a greeter.  With his sunny disposition today, he may not play as nice as he should.  He hasn't had any sleep and he is crabbier without it.  Oh well.  It was probably nice for him to work there.

Who made breakfast necessary?

Tom could eat the moment his feet hit the floor.  I, on the other hand, have a challenge to try to figure out what to eat in the a.m..  I have to eat to take my meds, but I really don't like breakfast food.  I'm more of a "bruncher" than I am excited about eating early.  I have "leftovers" from Mary's breakfast last night.  I also have yogurt, eggs, turkey bacon, bread and cheese.  It's just too early to eat, in my humble opinion.

Shouldn't the day start around 11?  Ween thinks so.  She usually gets up at the crack of 10, comes to the couch and proceeds to take her "nap time" at the other end.  (It is a lonnnngggg way from the bed to the couch.  It "could" be a grueling experience.)

I'm not sure if Mock is sleeping or at one of the parks.  He was supposed to let someone into STUDIOS today, but had not heard what time they wanted to get in.  His keys are not on the counter, but his doors are closed. Ah, the mysteries in my life.

The numbness in my brain says it's time to nap.  Honestly, Ween is so much wiser than I could ever be.  With "Gilmore Girls" music in the background, I just have to organize my day, right after my rest. Ween would be proud.

Cleaning Day

So many times I have said I am blessed with good friends.  Today is another example.  My friend Mary, who also happens to clean my apartment for me, cooked the most marvelous meal for Mock and me.  When she comes to clean, she also brings food.  Today's dinner "de jour" was actually a breakfast. Sausage and biscuits, sausage gravy over biscuits, toast with egg in the middle and hash browns that are to die for.  Everything is "homemade" and low in calories. It not only was great to eat but also marvelous for her to do this.  (Did I mention that she is also a caterer?)

Received a text from "Him."  Beautiful picture of Lake McDonald.  According to Wikipedia, it's the 2nd largest lake in Montana.  They are visiting Glacier National Park today.  And, afterward, I believe they're having a bbq.

We have gotten some much needed rain today.  I had to take a pain pill earlier so I slept most of the morning.  Ween has so much sympathy, she slept with me.  She is so helpful.  I woke up in time to shower and let Mary into the apt.

Now that our "tummys" are full, we're thinking very seriously of going to bed. That is probably the best idea Ween has had all day.

I wouldn't tell "Him" this, but I miss "Him" when he's gone.  I hope he has a great time.

It's Party Time

Dropped "someone" off at the airport this morning. He's on his way to his first leg of his journey.  (He has a rough job, but somebody has to do it.) He's doing one of the "Adventures" because he has to know what he is talking about when he talks to Media People about the trip.  He will be in Kalispel, Montana for a few days.  He wants to see Glacier Park.  According to him, it's free tomorrow.  I would love to have gone but at this time, I'm not quite able to do all that involves.  I'd love to see Canada, and do all the wonderful things they will be experiencing.  Maybe some day.

While I was at the airport, which took all of 12 minutes, Ween managed to put herself in the proverbial doghouse. I took her out 2 minutes before I left. When I came home, there was a "gift," "heap," or ginormous "PILE" on the carpet in front of the door.  And, another smaller pile over by the dining room table, AND a large wet spot on the carpet going into Mock's room.  I was, and still am, LIVID.  That has sealed her doom.  She WILL NOT be left loose when I exit the apartment.  She WILL BE penned in the kitchen.  It's a good thing Mary is cleaning tomorrow. She has a special liquid she uses on the carpet to get up the "spots."

When I finally move into my house, I will only have tile.  That will eliminate a lot of problems on her part.  Until then, if I don't kill her she will be lucky.

Other than going to the airport, I am basically "holding down the couch" again today.  Mock injured his thumb last night and went to "Centre Care" and had x-rays.  They said it wasn't broken, but he's not supposed to use it for several weeks.  I'm sure that is going to go over like a lead balloon with his boss.  He uses the keyboard all shift, soooo who knows how they will handle that. Since he did it at work, it is considered Workman's Comp.  He's wearing a brace over his thumb and forearm.  What fun.  Always something exciting going on in my life.

I am cooking "black beans," which I haven't done for a very long time.  Julie sent me some on Memorial Day and they were delicious.  And, believe it or not, Arby's roast beef sandwiches and black bean soup are the only two things my stomach could tolerate when I had ulcers.  Since I had some black beans in the pantry, I decided to see how they would taste.

And, paperwork.  Don't get me started on all the paperwork that needs to be filed and filled out.  It's all over the apt. and it needs to be gone.  Since the "tooth fairy" isn't available, I guess I have to do it.  Of course, I haven't tried pixie dust.  I'll see if I can find some.

No Dr Day - Wahoo

Today is another resting day.  I was released yesterday to drive and exercise.  I felt like singing - Free at Last.  I sometimes sound so pitiful to myself.  It's impossible to deny I'm blessed.  I have far more "things," friends and family than most people, yet sometimes I get in a "funk" and can't see a way out of issues.  


I'm reminded of Job and what he had to endure.  I'm nowhere near that place, yet occasionally I feel God has hit his "MUTE" button and is ignoring me entirely.  In a verbal whisper in my ear in Jerusalem, He promised to take care of me. Sometimes His idea of care isn't mine. And yet, I hear Garth Brooks' song, "Sometimes I Thank God for Unanswered Prayers."


Is God saying to satan what He said about Job - "Have you considered my servant Sheila?"  Can He actually say that about me? I'm not sure.

If it's Tuesday it must be Jacksonville

Here I am again. As the picture indicates, I'm waiting to see another Dr at Mayo. Most waiting rooms look alike, right? This one isn't any different. We've been here since 8:30, with a short trip to Bob Evans, and I'm pretty much over it. 


Don't even have time to see Aida. She isn't free until 3, and I can't wait until then.  According to Dr, I "probably" have a pinched nerve, hopefully.  If not, we may have to do surgery.  


Testing today - x-rays; EKG; and wanted to do blood work, but it has to be done fasting, so we had to put that off until I can get it done.  When I go back, in July, he wants to do MRI, blood work, pain induction (?) and decide what needs to be done.  


According to him, I was taking the wrong medication for pain, so he changed it.  Mock says I can take one and see him next Thursday.  (He has more experience with pain meds than I do, so he thinks this will put me out.)  He's probably right.  Two aspirins knock me out for the night, so I don't know what this stuff will do.  We'll see.  The script says I can take one every 4 hrs.  (Yeah.  That is going to happen.)


Had dinner with Julie and Bret.  Julie invited us to stop on our way home.  It was delicious.  I'm really not to have spicy foods, and this wasn't too bad, but it was Tacos.  I made a Taco salad and ate about half.  I brought the other half home for tomorrow. MMMMMMMMM good.


Just got home and I'm totally wiped.  I have another dr's appt tomorrow and "he" is taking me.  I feel really awful that "he" is missing so much work, but "he" says not to worry about it.  So, I won't.


Ween is already in bed.  I'm right behind her.  I wonder if she took one of my pills?  Na. She can't even open the bottle.  It's a "thumb" thing.

Monday Again

Once again Monday happens.  Ween and I held down the bed most of the day yesterday.  I don't know why, but I had no energy at all.  I think the Coumadin and my blood pressure medicine are interacting to lower my blood pressure too low.

No appts today.  Wow.  It's a miracle. Tomorrow "he" is taking me to MAYO in Jacksonville.  I absolutely HATE not being able to drive.  It is such a nuisance. Someone must take me everywhere outside the apartment.  It's ridiculous, but I guess necessary.  Hopefully, it should end soon.

Wednesday is another "blood" checking day.  I have to go to the drs office to have that done.  I also need to get my allergy shots at another drs office. Hopefully, no other drs this week. It will seem like vacation.

I Know where I was

Forty-five years ago today, I was in Nashville, TN. The plans were made. People were in place. All was set up for the big event. What could possibly go wrong? Tom forgot my flowers; I was so nervous I had to pee, with my dress on, five minutes before going down the aisle; I put his ring on the wrong finger; It rained all day and night. Did any of that stop us? Thank goodness it didn't.


I was married to one of the most amazing people in the world. I didn't even realize it at the time. The first year and a half were wonderful. We loved. We laughed. We had fun. Then I found out I was pregnant and I threw up all nine months. That does not make for a "happy" time.


He was understanding, helpful, and patient. I was a total bitch, and I didn't even know it. I didn't know how to love that man properly. I did not let him be the person God had created him to be. I was self absorbed, and not the woman God wanted me to be. If I could I would go back and change so many things.


That man made such an impression on me. I learned so much from him, and his "sayings." I recently spent some time with our old friends Mary and Byron. We reminisced about those times - most were good; some not so much. We all felt we were blessed to have known him, even for such a short time.

Rain, Rain

Today is an especially nice day to stay indoors.  Our much needed rain has finally arrived in Orlando.  My view from the couch, out my patio doors, gives me a very green view of the "flora and fauna" that is on the property.

Ween is terribly distressed at the water all around.  She loves baths but hates rain.  Go figure.

Mock has had a busy day today.  After sleeping two hours, he had an 8:00 am breathing test at the hospital.  Came home and tired to sleep a few hours.  On to pick up a friend who needs to return a u-haul she used to move, and then take her to her new place which is not really close to anywhere.  He is planning to go to work from there.  He is extremely "crabby" when he doesn't get sleep.  (I hope he doesn't get fired today.)

My "relative" is taking me shopping tomorrow.  I'm still in a "resting" mode and can't drive.  That is really annoying.  I don't think that is a "control" issue, but it sure is limiting to where and when you can go some where.  I'm really getting tired of it.  I can't even imagine how he feels taking me everywhere.

We go to Mayo on Tuesday.  He is driving.  This is a great inconvenience for him.  He hasn't complained once.  He hasn't even indicated that he doesn't like doing it.  I so appreciate him.  Maybe I'll be able to drive soon.  That would really be nice.  Ween agrees.

PaPa John's or Dominoes?

Being on hold  for about 20 minutes, aggravates me.  It seems like every time I place an on-line pizza order, it has something wrong and it takes an act of Congress to get it straightened out.  I finally had to call an 877 number and talk with a "trouble shooter" for Papa John's.  He was very polite and even offered to send me extra garlic sauce for my inconvenience.  The next great adventure is to see if it REALLY comes like I ordered it.

Ween has slept through the ordeal.  She raised her head once, gave me a dirty look, and decided it wasn't worth her effort.  I told you she is smart. Her motto - "Never get excited unless it involves food and I can smell it."

Mock went to get some sodas since Papa John's has Pepsi not Coke.  It is heresy to even mention anything but Coke.  Some people are so picky.

Another rest day today.  I have my blood checked tomorrow.  Mock is taking me.  After all that excitement,  we get to go to his doctor.  I tell you, if it wasn't for trips to the doctor or a hospital, I'd have no social life.  I wonder if I can somehow spin all the visiting into a paying job?  Hummmmm.

Day Off

Most people have Memorial Day off from work.  I wonder if they know why? When I was in the "wonderful world of education", the kids only knew they didn't have to go to school.  After trying to explain why this date was important, I usually got the response "Whatever."

IF I were teaching again, I would change some things.  I would teach phonics and spelling to every class; celebrate EVERY possible holiday; make each student feel more important; try to make them smile; and, enjoy each day.  

I have a lot of things I would do differently, if I could have a "redo" in my personal life.  I know I'd be a better wife and tell my husband how wonderful he was every single day.  Feeling I was too hard on my children, I would try to "back off" from all the rules and regulations and enjoy them more.  I'd try to ignore unimportant things and emphasize the good times even more. I'd try to be more aware of people's feelings and emotions.  I'd try to be nice to everyone.

I have heard some people say they have no regrets about their life.  I wish I could say that, but I try not to focus on the things I did wrong.  I have so many "right" people and things in my life.  "Someone" went to some one's house for lunch today and brought back a  "humongous" amount of food.  I've only been able to eat the rice and beans so far, but the chicken, potato salad and the watermelon all look good too.  He even brought me some Tylenol as I can't take aspirin any more.  See.  I know that I am blessed, and I never have doubted that for one moment.

Home at Last, Again

After three and a half days in an extremely nice hospital, I was "sprung" from the joint.  They finally did the endoscopy this morning and found 2 ulcers in my stomach - one on the side and one in the bottom.  That will take care of the bleeding and I'm back on coumadin as of this evening, only at a lower dose. Dr Martin thinks I should still be on it because of the thickness of my blood. (If I had know I would have needed this body this long, I would have taken better care of it.)

Ween is so "thrilled" to have me home.  She has done her happy dance, licked me all over, and is now resting from the exhaustion.  That is the most exercise she has had in many days.  She has assumed her position at the end of the couch, just two feet from me.  She doesn't want me to do anything without her, especially eating.

I must rest now.  Long day for me; up at 4:30 - blood work, and it only went downhill from there.  I can hardly wait to see what she is fixing for dinner.

STALLED

No news is supposed to be good news; Not necessarily true. I am still in the hospital, still not able to do procedure. Dr said he has no problem doing it on Sat. 


The number has come down, but not enough yet. So, I'm "Resting" again today. 


I really miss Ween. I'm sure she misses me too. Hopefully I will able to go home tomorrow, if they do the procedure early. In the meantime, I'm connecting the bruises as a pastime.

Here We Go Again

I hate to be repitious but, I'm back in the hospital. I have one of those lifetimes, it seems, that lately has gone from one direction to rapidly changing to another. It seems fairly simple to go to the doctor to have your blood checked, and yet lands you in the hospital. 


I'm beginning to believe that I am missing the message. I don't know what is, but I'd love to know. I have promised God that I am totally clueless as to what He wants me to do. He already knows that but I'm willing to do Whatever I'm supposed to do, just let me know what it could be. 


Yep. Here I am. This time is something a little different. I'm having some internal bleeding and my doctor doesn't want to take any chances while I'm taking the Coumadin. He also put me back on the "heart" menu here. It really isn't bad, but not what I wanted. Oh ok. Whatever. I'm hoping I won't be here long. 


Poor Ween. She's so confused as to what I'm doing. Home a few days, gone a few days. She's not the only one confused. Already told me they are doing an endoscopy. Dr Martin just in and not doing the testing until Friday. My blood count has dropped and he wants my blood "numbers" to stabilize. 


I apologize for this typing as I am using the iPad and I'm not so familiar with this keyboard. I will continue to blog about the everyday rantings and ramblings. This doesn't change the type either so, enjoy.

Italy

Seeing old friends is great until I see their children have grown "like weeds," as my mother would have said.  The oldest child, Samantha, is now going into 8th grade.  She's taller than her mother.  Michael, the middle child, is still Michael, and Giada is in charge of everyone.  (She resembles her mother in a lot of ways.)

Aunt Jenny was with them and I met two new members of her family - Matt, Trisha's brother and Steve, Matt's partner.  Lovely people and enjoyed the evening.

The food was not as tasty as I expected.  This is a new Italian addition where they had made reservations.  The calamari was rubbery; the veal overdone; the stuffed mushrooms dried out; but the spaghetti and potatoes were good. I must have found something to eat as I was too full to order a delicious looking dessert.  Today they are eating at Morocco, one of my favorite places to eat.  MMmmmmm.  I would love to join them for this one.

Today includes a check-up of my blood.  Mock has a CAT scan scheduled.  Full afternoon.  We'll probably stop at the store to use my gift card.  It's a good thing I have generous friends and relatives.  They know me so well, and that is usually a good thing.

Another day; Same couch

Having only a cell phone and no land line, I seldom have weird calls of advertising or wanting to give me something.  I had a call earlier that wanted to give me $7,000 from the "government of the United States."  I was interested.  The voice was male with an East Indian accent.  Bottom line is IF I go to a Western Union and send them 250.00 then they will release the $7,000 to my account.  Hmmmmm.  A, I don't think so.  I just told him I couldn't drive to go to the Western Union office.  And, that is true.  I DIDN'T tell him I didn't have 250.00 to give him.  I probably should have told him.  I wonder what he would have said if I had said that.  Oh well.

It's another day of holding down the couch for Ween and me.  Actually she is laying in front of the sliding glass door soaking up some sun.  That is as close as she wants to be to the outdoors, unless of course the squirrel comes by or the duck visits.  That is a totally different story.

I'm resting again today.  We do have a dinner resv with friends from NY.  It's at Italy in EPCOT, and as long as I feel okay I will probably go.  They are a neat couple with 3 lovely children.  We try to see them when in NY and visa versa for them here.  We'll see how that goes.

Somehow I have misplaced my recording sheet for my daily vitals.  I'm hoping that Rose has picked it up in her stuff.  If not, the machine retains the information and I'll have to start another one.  I'll make Ween write it down. She's okay as long as it doesn't require a thumb.  Then her writing gets a little sloppy.  I'll just have to deal with it.  Life is so hard.

AH, FRIENDS

Probably the two people on this earth who have known me the longest are Mary and Byron.  Tom and Byron were friends for some time when I was admitted to the group.

It was college; Tom and I started dating; he introduced me to his friend, and then I met his friend's wife.  Any complimentary word you can think of, pertains to Mary.  Talented, sweet, knowledgeable, etc.  I could go on and on. Her personality was the opposite of mine - she was quiet, unassuming, only talked to answer questions, a lot like Tom.  Byron on the other hand was outgoing, bubbly, always ready to talk about anything. We seemed to fit together - Tom and Mary - quiet; Byron and me - not so much. 

This weekend "the relative I can't mention" said he wanted to go to Tallahassee to see some friends.  Mary and Byron live close to his friends so I asked if I could tag along.  The last time I was at their home, same location, was about a year ago.  It was pitch black dark and I had a hard time finding it as my Garmin didn't work well in that area.  

Mock tried our GPS on our phone to see where I was and it indicated I was in the middle of the woods with only dirt roads around.  He asked if I was camping out.  [Anyone who knows me knows that I would only camp out at the Grand Floridian at Disney.  Mock thought he was being funny. (HA)]

Dropped off with Mary and Byron and yes, Lucky their golden.  It is always so great to see them.  They know me and still love me; Now that is a friend.  We talked and talked.  Memories.  Byron cooked the most delicious dinner.  I have always loved his cooking.  Mary is no slouch at cooking but Byron puts such "flair" in his presentations and he explains how each  item is prepared; there's always a Byron twist on each item.  Baked chicken, field peas, baked potatoes, candied carrots, salad, AND a dessert to die for - angel food cake, pudding, whipped cream and strawberries.  I think it is called a trifle, but it was a type of parfait in layers and WOW, so good.  And the cappuccino, oh my goodness were they delicious too.

They have been on Weight Watchers for some time and lost a "ton of weight." Mary is probably the smallest she has ever been, or at least since I've known her.  They both look good and if they eat like they fed me, it's all good.  I also had breakfast with my son's friends.  It has been a long time since I've seen them.  And, then we had to come home.

I can hardly move today.  It seems when I try to do activities for a whole day, it wears me out for the next day or two.  So, Ween and I are holding down the couch and bed today.  She is playing "Saran Wrap" and if I move she jumps up to go with me.  Ever have anyone watch you go to the bathroom?  

Love/Hate Relationship

Wiener is a wonderful companion, most of the time.  She snuggles, keeps the house safe from the lawn mowers and weed whackers of the world, shows affection by licking almost everywhere on your body, and sleeps as much as I do.

Every once in a while though, she just aggravates me to death.  She's pushy, impatient, begs for food, NEEDS attention, and sometimes leaves little "oopsies" on the carpet.  I had a queen-sized bed that didn't have enough room for her. She wants to sleep beside you, yet kicks with both feet when she wants more room. If she turns over and scoots off the bed or couch, she gives you a look of disgust and thinks you pushed her. If she doesn't like when I tell her no, she "SNORTS" at me and huffs off.  And, don't even get me started on her revenge mode.  Mock says I created her "Monster" behavior.  I tend to think she was born this way.

I need my beauty sleep

Talking with other Daschund families, the overall breed responds with similar behaviors.  According to most books I've read, they were bred to hunt badgers for farmers in Germany.  They would viciously retrieve the badgers from underground to rid the farms of the scavengers.  This explains their tunneling and able to sleep and breathe under the covers.

I'd just like to know what explains their attitude problems.  This is something that is quite evident in most of the ones I've seen.  Wiener goes after most any other dog, regardless of size.  Most of the time, this is okay.  But, I wouldn't ask her about a "ginormous" malamute she once encountered.  It was not pretty and you really don't want to encounter her disdain.  It would really help if you show up with treats.  She works well for food.

Today

Yesterday came and went.  Lunch with Ruth and Carol; Dr's appt. All my vital signs are being monitored and everything was going nicely.  About one am this morning, my heart decided to start "tap dancing."  All my medical people tell me to document, document, document.  I was in bed, watching TV, when it started.  Nothing exciting going on; could not tell why it started.


I finally fell asleep, exhausted, around 3.  (It makes me tired.)  I woke up around 6:30 - heart still "dancing."  (Gene Kelly would have been jealous.)  I DID document the incidences on my heart monitor.  I have been wearing it for several days.  This is the first time it has been documented by a monitor.  I spaced the recordings about 4 hrs apart.  


I got up and worked on the computer for about an hour; heart still dancing.  It doesn't usually hurt but extremely annoying and tiring.


The "other" vital-sign monitor went off at 9:00.  The heart beat was 93, and it is usually around 65 each am.  Otherwise, everything else was okay.  After transmitting the vital machine info, I called the heart monitor company and transmitted my heart activities. They saw the arrhythmia and was supposed to call the Dr's office.  It is 4:30 and I haven't heard from anyone.


By 11:00 I was worn out and went back to bed.  (Ween was right beside me all morning.) When I woke up around 3:30, my heart was beating regularly and I felt fine


This is the first time that the dancing has happened in a while.  It can't be determined why it starts or why it stops, or what is causing it.  Who knows - it could be most anything.  I pray that is all for now.  I want to go to Tallahassee to see Mary and Byron. Ween will not be happy being left at home.  Oh well.  Mock will have to deal with her, until I come back.

Red Lobster or Olive Garden

A thin little blond-headed girl, about five years old, walked up to me, stretched out her hand, and said, "Hi.  I'm Lynn Uxxxxxx, and I am in your Kindergarten class."  Little did I know on that day in 1980 that this little girl's mother and I would become the best of friends.


Ruth is a tremendous person with much knowledge and talent.  She has a music degree, was the main programmer for Pasco County Library System, and has battled cancer. She's one of the smartest and bravest people I know. 


I knew her Mom and Dad.  Sweet people.  Her mother, also named Ruth, was blind and lived with Ruth and Jim the last few years of her life.  Jim and Tom were colleagues as they both were in the music departments of the school systems. Our lives intertwined in so many ways over those last few years.  We have marvelous memories.  As we recalled some today, we had to laugh out loud.


Lunch today was at the Red Lobster in DTD.  Ruth and Carol, a childhood friend of Ruth's, came here to meet me for lunch. As I am in a "stay put" mode, they graciously offered to drive over here and even brought me home after we ate. Once again, I am so blessed with marvelous friends.


"Does it hurt to have sex?"  Ruth's 2nd grade granddaughter asked her mother.  Ruth said Lynn almost ran off the road when Alex asked her that.  It brought back a "similar" embarassing moment with Lynn. 


Ruth was pregnant with her second child when I met her. Sarah was born during Lynn's year in Kindergarten.  Ruth and Jim, being fairly progressive parents allowed Lynn to be present during the birth.  Of course, Lynn had a new experience for "SHOW AND TELL" the next day. She could have taught the class on the delivery.  Her terms were correct and the vivid verbal account of the birth was so detailed that I felt I had to let the other parents know about the new bit of knowledge we learned in Kindergarten that day.  See Lynn.  Paybacks.  I loved it.

I Remember

The week before Tom died he got to see both of his sons-Tommy on Thursday and Charles on Sat.  Both were seemingly accidental.  I believe it was one of those "God Things."

Tommy's vacuum broke and he needed to borrow ours.

("BORROW" is an interesting word, especially in my family.  Yes, the normal definition of borrow is "to obtain or receive something with the understanding of returning the item." The definition is not so literal in my family.  Borrow seems to mean "get the item and conveniently forget to return it."  And, it's okay because it's family.)  Tom took Tommy our vacuum when Tom went to a county band practice in St Pete Thursday night.  I think they even ate dinner together.

The week-end before was my mother's birthday.  Our schedules were so crazy that we planned to celebrate on April 7 at the Don Caesar Resort in St Pete. Tommy had made reservations.

Charles had a prior commitment for Sunday, so he came over on Sat and took us to lunch.  Tom got to spend time with him that day.

Tom was so proud of his sons.  They both are sons that most parents could only dream of having.  They're intelligent, talented, leaders in their field of choice, and they are good to their mother.

As we approach this year's Mother's Day, I thank God for my sons, and yes for the additionally acquired three men that have come to mean so much to me. Lucky?  Not at all.  TRULY BLESSED.

Not Exactly

Starting at 8:30, Julie showed up to take me to my first meeting with my allergist.  I didn't get to see my regular doctor, but the other doctor diagnosed a sinus infection and gave me 3 Rx; on to my next stop.  Chamberlins Health Food store for doggy food for Wiener; Post Office to mail a thank you card. Time for brunch at Mimis.  Quiche and toast, yum.

Off again to Publix to get a few groceries and drop off Rxs.  Their antibiotics are free. Of the other two, the eye drops were $120.00.  You can almost get new glasses for that.  He also prescribed Predinsone (That would be 3 months on the drug.  I WON'T DO IT!)  I can't lose weight using that drug so I'm not using it.  Hopefully the antibiotic will suffice.

Took groceries home and got to rest 45 minutes before we were off again to my next appointment.  On to Downtown Orlando to get a heart monitor.  Had to wait about 45 minutes just to get the unit.  I've been there before so not much instruction needed.

Stopped at Sand Lake Hospital to pick up meds from there; next to Public to pick up meds; also stopped at the Planet Smoothie to get an energy boost. Had one more stop but I was too wiped to do it.  Called Charles and asked if he would pick up 2 Rx from Target.  He said yes and Julie took me home.  It was now 4:30ish.

What a long exhausting day.  I came home and Ween and I went to bed. Slept until 8:30, got a sandwich, took meds, and went back to bed until around 5:30 this morning.

Two visiting nurses came today - one to check on my vitals and make sure I'm doing my procedures correctly.  Another nurse came and dropped ANOTHER machine to check vitals.  I'm not sure how many times I can take the tests, read the results, write down the results and transmit the results to someone in the "nanosphere."  I love technology.

As a result of yesterday, today I ache. Every fiber of my total physical being hurts. This is usually what happens when I push myself to go on and on.

I believe I am whole.  God is still in control.

UPDATE?

And, coming to you straight from "my little corner of the couch," all is well with my soul.  My physical body is being made whole, slowly but surely.

My sugar level is normal.  My blood "Number" is 2.3, last we checked.  (2 was our goal) And, my blood pressure was 120/84.  The number they were wanting was for an infection level, I think.  They explained it all but after a while and many "glowing" lectures of what I should be or shouldn't be, should do or shouldn't do, they all sound like Charlie Brown's teacher to me. (Whaa, Whaa, Whaa, etc.)

Getting ready for my two appointments today.  Julie got the short straw and will be here soon.

Ween is coming to join me while I am "holding down the couch," and work on my blog.  Typing is not her forte, but she's great with moral support.  As I was typing, before I was "so rudely" interrupted, I'm seeing my allergist, and after that running errands, having lunch and then going to get a heart monitor that I am to wear for 2 weeks.  (Maaannn.  What they won't think of to torture me.)

Shower, clean clothes, and smelling better - all good goals for the day.

Mother's Day Again?

In just a few days "we" will be celebrating another annual Mother's Day Sunday.  As I have aged, and wisely so, I have come to believe specific days are nice, but doesn't it depend on how you treat someone all year long?


With having 2 naturally born sons, I have also "acquired" three additional "guys" who were not born of me but I was chosen as a Mother figure to them.


Bret and Julie are unbelievable.  Their "girls" are so precious.  I feel fortunate to have them in my life.  They are talented and make extremely wise decisions.  Bret is level headed, knowledgeable and capable.  Julie can do anything and usually does, all at the same time.  Kinzie has grown into a talented, capable young lady who knows who she is and uses her own mind to make decisions.  Kayla is, and will always be, the princess.  She's artistic, musical, "swirley" and so full of life.  She is a "PINK" princess who expects everyone to love her. (And they do.)


Edward came into my life by virtue of being a roommate of Tom's.  I have missed seeing him so much.  He has such talent and generosity that it is hard not to love him.  He is developing his artistic abilities and wants to go back to school to gain more knowledge in his field of expertise.


And last of all, but not least, Mock.  What can I say about him?  He's opinionated, smart mouthed, and surly at times, but he has a heart of gold and takes very good care of me. (He's also my roommate, for those of you who don't know.)  


All the guys take care of me in so many ways.  Explaining what they mean to my life is a major undertaking.  


I would be greatly amiss not to mention Wiener.  She's the only "girl" chosen by me.  Her comfort was missed while I was in the hospital.  I found myself, early one morning, petting my covers thinking it was her.  And, when we were reunited, as the doggy cartoon says, "She was so excited to see me, she didn't know whether to lick me or pee."  With her, either is possible.  She has surely been my "Saran Wrap Girl" for the last few days.  She provides comic relief and extra moral support each and every day.


All the superlatives that exist and then some are not enough to explain how I feel about my family and friends. I am truly blessed and spoiled.  If I were to live another thousand years, I would still be thanking God for the blessings of friendship and family.  Each and every day is special to me. I am truly blessed beyond what I deserve.  Thank you God.

What's the punch line?

So, I was sitting here, minding my own business, and the gate phone rang. Ween knows that means visitors so she starts barking, dancing, and jumping. She can't really dance or jump; legs too short and weighs too much, but she tries.

The person at the gate was the person from Home Healthcare.  Two hours later and so much information zipping around my brain, she asked if I had any questions.  Since I blanked out most of what she said, I told her I didn't have any questions. ( I didn't know enough to ask questions.)  I have since garnered from Mock and "the person I can't mention by name."  Mock was a EMT and the other person has been diagnosed with Diabetes and has been through this. (Great resource)

Next,  my trip to the Dr, to find out my blood count "something" or other is not high enough, so I am still on my BLOOD shots to boost my blood. Wellllllll, any idiot could know that my blood should be low in everything.  I'm a quart low according to my dip stick from all the blood letting they have done in the last two weeks.  I'm sure they are supplying the free world with my platelets.

My relative brought me home and called a little later to go to dinner.  He's so sweet.  I think he's worried about me.  He brought me ginger ale, flowers, and spent all kinds of time with me in the hospital.  I'm still expecting to be whole, and the sooner the better.

And then there is Ween's philosophy - "Sleep cures everything."  Even though it's only 6, I think we both need to go hold down the bed.  We're getting really good at that. It comes from lots of practice.

FINALLY HOME

For those of you who have been concerned and checking back and forth, I'm FINALLY HOME.  Whew.  It was a whirlwind trip.

Apparently, I was having TIAs, which I thought was for Tampa International Airport, but apparently not.  Results of the MRI revealed several small blood clots in the brain.  My Dr is concerned and has put me on Coumadin or a blood thinner.  I'm taking shots for several days.  I'll have home-health care during that time and I will be on pills after that.

There was not any clots in the cardioid area, so that's good. My sugar level is fluctuating and they're trying to get that stabilized.  My eye surgery is postponed for at least 6 months.  My physical therapy is to be rescheduled.  I go to my primary care physician tomorrow and go back to the cardiologist in one month.  He will redirect my activities at that time.  Until then, I am supposed to rest and not have any stress in my life.  (Hahahahaha) Oh, he was serious.  I will be off the prednisone by Friday and that should help with that weight gain.  I'm supposed to be on a "bland" diet.  I said "So, basically, if it tastes good, spit it out."  Pretty much!

There are some other minor issues that my doctors are working with and hopefully those will be resolved soon.

So, Ween and I are "in our position" on the couch; I guess we're resting for a while.  Thank you for all the prayers.    I will let you know if there are any changes.

WHAT LORD?

After all the events of the last few weeks, I have come to the conclusion that God is trying to tell me something. What? I'm tired of trying to guess, or doing the wrong thing. Hmmmmm?


After arriving at the hospital for my blood work today, I had another "episode" with my heart. I was rushed to ER, and after several hours of testing on me there, I was admitted to the hospital for more testing. So, here I am. Laying around with no where to go and nothing to do. Julie added Netflix to my iPad. 


I'm going to choose a movie to watch. Poor Ween. She doesn't know what has happened to her Mommy. It's hard enough for me to understand. God willing they will finish the MRI tomorrow and I can go home. I'm so tired of this. Don't I sound pitiful? Actually I'm probably better off than 3/4 of the population of Orlando. It's rough laying around, being waited on and nothing to do. Of course, being at the beach would be better but ...

Laugh or Cry?

According to 1 Corinthians 10:13 "No testing has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tested beyond what you can bear. But when you are tested, He will also provide a way out so that you can endure it."
As Joyce Meyer would say, "This is just a test.  It is only a test."


The last few years, God has allowed the testing far beyond what I consider the amount I can bear.  Just one more thing; and then another, and another, and another.  And, just when I think it is over, another "THING" happens. And, yet, He sends someone or something we need to take care of that "THING."


The last few weeks have been so emotional, as I have said.  This week another set of "things" are cropping up.  Today was supposed to be, what I have come to call, a DOWN or Rest day.  Mock had appts starting with a 10:00 blood work test.  I woke him; he got dressed; left the apartment and came back within a minute stating the car battery was dead.  


I just had the car serviced.  Why wasn't that found?  Another "thing" to deal with.  None of the men in the apartment office have jumper cables (Interesting, huh?)  I called "the relative I can't mention," and he came all the way here from work, jumped the car, and went to pick up the prescription for my blood work to be done tomorrow before the MRI. (He must love me.) 


The Dr's offices is telling me that a blood test is not necessary to do an MRI. The hospital is telling me that they require a blood test before MRIs. (Interesting, huh?) The hospital sent a request for a RX for blood work. And, had not received the information from the Dr's office.  I asked the Dr's office to fax a copy to the hospital; even gave them the number to fax; it was also included on the request. I didn't want to take any chances, so "He" picked up the Rx for me so that we will have it tomorrow.


At O:dark:30 tomorrow, I am to be at the hospital for blood work before the MRI.  Interesting, if not enjoyable.

"YO YO" OR ROLLERCOASTER?

Emotions are tricky.  The last few weeks have been all over the "physical" and "mental" map of my life.  My eye surgery has been put on hold.  When my cardiologist told me that, it was all I could do to hold it together until I got to the car.  He will not "sign off" on my eye surgery until he finds out what is happening with my heart;  Me and my big mouth.  I guess I shouldn't have told the opthomologist's office about the heart problem.

As I reached for the keys to start the car, the thought "My Life Is In Your Hands" came to mind.  I went to I-tunes to find a copy of an old song I knew as a child.  I didn't find that one but found a new one by the same name recorded by Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir:

You don't have to worry; And don't you be afraid

Joy comes in the morning; Troubles they don't last always

For there's a friend in Jesus; who will wipe the tears away
And, if your heart is broken;  just lift your hands and say 

Oh I know that I can make it; I know that I can stand;
No matter what,   may come my way; My life is in your hands.

You don't have to worry; And don't you be afraid

Joy comes in the morning; Troubles they don't last always

For there's a friend in Jesus; who will wipe the tears away

And, if your heart is broken;  just lift your hands and say 

Oh I know that I can make it; I know that I can stand;

No matter what,   may come my way; My life is in your hands.

When your tests and trials, they seem to get you down

And all your friends and loved ones;  are nowhere to be found

Remember there's a friend in Jesus; who will wipe the tears away

And, if your heart is broken;  just lift your hands and say 

Oh I know that I can make it; I know that I can stand;

No matter what,   may come my way;  My life is in your hands.

You don't have to worry; And don't you be afraid

Joy comes in the morning; Troubles they don't last always

My life is in your hand.

Enough said!