Piece of cake

One Dr down and 2 more to go.  My opthomologist has scheduled cataract surgery on my right eye on May 16 at 7:00 am.  That time is just WRONG.  Not only am I going to feeling yucky, but I'm also going to be hungry and sleepy.  I know there is a law somewhere against early morning hours. (Sounds like naming Snow White's dwarfs - Yucky, Hungry, Sleepy...)


I am having an early "breakfast" tomorrow with some friends. We meet about every month just to get reacquainted.  We all have worked together at some or other and really enjoy catching up on all the stuff each one is doing.


After breakfast I go to see my cardiologist.  Mock is taking me as my eye doctor has "recommended" that I not drive a lot until after surgery, especially at night.  So, I'm pretty much stuck at the mercy of friends and family.  


The person I can't mention took me to the Dr. today as they dilated my pupils.  It was about 9:30 am, and it didn't start wearing off until around 4.  Good thing he was with me.  He even bought me lunch at Sweet Tomatoes.


While I was getting my eyes checked, we dropped off the car to have it serviced.  It only needed $1,000 worth of work done.  When I stated my surprise to the mechanic, he said I was getting a rebate of $100.  I said the only way I could get it done was getting a rebate of $1,000.  He laughed.  At least he has a sense of humor.


Ween had such a hard day, she has to take a nap.  I tell you eating, pooping and looking cute is a hard job, but somebody has to do it.

Here we go again

Wouldn't it be nice if we got paid, by the hour, for the time we spend in Dr's waiting rooms.  Man would I be rich.  Once again this week, I'm doing the Dr thing.  Monday - Optometrist; Tuesday - Pulmonary; Wednesday - Cardiologist.  The relative I'm not supposed to mention is taking me to the appt tomorrow as they dilate the pupils and it is not a good idea for me to drive afterward.

Mock is taking me Tuesday after breakfast with "The Motley Crue" at Cracker Barrel.  Don't know about Wednesday yet.  I haven't been able to talk anyone into taking me.  I hate having to depend on someone else to take me places. It's been suggested that I NOT drive as I'm still experiencing a type of vertigo and my vision is still "suspect" as to sharpness of being able to see.

I had to reschedule my appointments at Mayo as I just couldn't drive there, physically.  They have rescheduled for June.  Long time.  We'll see how things go.

I am scheduled to start therapy, that's physical not mental, on May 9.  I can't wait to go.  It will be at Celebration Hospital and they have a pool.  I really NEED to exercise.  We'll see how my heart does with this; hopefully it will happen.

Ween and I are "holding down the couch" again today.  I didn't get to go to church for several reason, and I miss not being able to go.  Hopefully I will be COMPLETELY WHOLE soon and I can get back to "DOING" and not just sitting around.  I am thanking God for making me whole.  I can't wait to get started on my "projects."

MY GREAT GOD

Bless the Lord, Oh my soul, and all that is within me bless His Holy name.


Bless the Lord, Oh my soul, and all that is within me bless His Holy name.


He has done great things.  He has done great things.  


He has done great things.  Bless His Holy name.

Things

Throughout my life, there have been many things that I have experienced. While I was pondering this day, I said to myself, "Self-there are some things I NEVER want to do again." I began to re-form that list in my head.

I NEVER WANT TO:

1.   ride a roller coaster.

2.   use a bathroom in Tijuana, Mexico.

3.   eat or drink something I don't know what it is.

4.   go on a hay ride.

5.   drive through Georgia.

6.   have another surgery.

7.   wear high heel shoes.

8.    buy another outfit because a friend says it looks good on me.

9.    visit the "museum" at Cedar Key.

10.   buy another car that is NOT a convertible.

Ten are enough for now, but obviously there are more.  Stay tuned.

Not Today

Sometimes it seems, I think, in my blogs that I am lackadaisical about my life especially with my health or, money or most anything I ramble on about. Usually not so.  I do a "stream of consciousness" writing - whatever pops into my mind at the moment goes on the page.  That is not to say I don't do anything about circumstances or do not have moments of lucidity where I can actually know what is going on and what to do.  DOES THAT MAKE SENSE? I'm not sure.

Some have expressed concern about me.  I covet prayers - always.  I truly want guidance from God.  And, I NEVER want to forget His goodness.  But I HONESTLY don't worry about anything.  I have some concerns.  I seek wisdom.  I also seek mercy and grace.

We have a fairly good relationship - God and me.  He knows me.  He speaks to me.  I TRY to listen carefully. I used to say to Tom that I was the "balloons" the clown in "my Circus" was carrying and he was the clown holding onto the strings.  (We all know what happens if you let go of the string.)  I do have a tendency to fly around the room backwar, but not without God holdling onto the balloons.

I am in ALMOST constant contact with my doctors.  I have been to four or five this week.  I had a new "stress" test and multiple blood tests.  (I thought I had enough stress in my life.)  My C-pap machine has been changed to a newer and better one; I AM RESTING,  as I was told.  I'm not to have stress in my life right now.  (I told Dr Alabi that if I had any less stress I would be catatonic.)  Medicines have been regulated.  And, I am in the process of having additional testing for my heart.

They have determined that something isn't working correctly with the pumping of the blood flow.  Ween is taking good care of me and we are "holding down the couch" as much as possible.

Please continue the prayers.  Don't be too concerned.  I will keep you posted as to any changes.  I have decided whatever happens is a WIN/WIN situation. And, God is in control.

Garbage v Who I Am

Getting through all the garbage to WHOLENESS is like swimming in mousse (chocolate of course.) I don't know whether to paddle or start licking. Either one can get me into a mess.

I was to go to the local elementary school this week to help with testing. I went on Monday. Sat for 2 hrs and came home. Totally unnecessary as the teacher likes to have TOTAL control of her classroom. I would have loved to have been that organized, but it didn't happen for me.

I had a weird day, physically in that I sweated almost the whole time. I couldn't figure out what was wrong. Being exhausted, after I got home I slept until about 6pm. Getting something to eat was an effort, so I went back to sleep for the night. The next day, after getting ready I had some sort of "EPISODE" where I had the vertigo again and could not stand up. I thought it was some sort of seizure but Mock said it was a small stroke. I couldn't go to the school nor anywhere else for that matter. I was nauseated, had a strange "pulling" sensation in my right side (neck and arm) and had trouble talking. Mock said I slurred my words but I didn't hear that.

Again today I could not go to the school.  I am still feeling the vertigo and nausea.  I had felt so good for so long that I thought I could actually do something to help.  I hate that I couldn't work it out, and am embarrassed that I couldn't. I hope they are as understanding as they seem.

The garbage I am having to get through to WHOLENESS is interesting. God knows what it will take to get to TOTAL renewal.  Thank you God.

D-DAY

Classroom testing, in my opinion, is wasted time and gives you meaningless information.  With all things being even, which they aren't, it MIGHT be helpful to know where to start with sharing information for children to learn.  That would be helpful not the wanted end result.  Tests have a tendency to tell you what a person DOESN'T know, not what they DO know.

ALL PEOPLE ARE DIFFERENT WITH DIFFERENT EXPERIENCES, AND LEARN AT DIFFERENT RATES.

With that in mind, I have volunteered to proctor at my local elementary school for the FCAT, which starts today.  Interesting, if not enjoyable.  I don't know if I'm ready to be back in a classroom setting or not.  We'll see.  I haven't been there before today so I this is a new experience for me.  It's like my first day of school.  Wow.  I hope I can find the bathroom.

Summers

The summers were more exciting than the regular school year.  I liked school, don't get me wrong.  I still do.  I love reading, learning, and finding out what I DON'T know.  (There is so much)  Summer was different.  The wake-up time wasn't as early.  My mother still made sure I didn't sleep.  It must have been something in her childhood that made her think that sleeping late was a sin or close to it.  She always had some sort of NOISE factor that would wake me about 8 every morning.  My truly favorite was the washing machine. Why, pray tell, did the washing have to be done on Saturday?  My mother was a "stay at home" Mother and could have washed any time during the week. But, Nooooooooooooooo.  It had to be on Saturday at O:dark 30.

I slept on the second floor.  The washing machine was in the basement three floors away.  How she managed to get that machine loud enough to wake me, I'll never know.  I just know that as an adult, I am very considerate of when I wash my clothes. And, I hate being awaken by loud noises.

Another favorite noise was the tree trimmers.  That was also done at the crack of "chickens waking" on Saturday.  I could never figure that out during my twelve summers of being out of school. (The chickens were annoyed too.)

The important part of Summer was that I got to go to Vacation Bible School at all the different churches in the tiny berg where I lived.  My mother didn't realize that I actually liked going.  What could be better than learning about Jesus, making crafts, eating snacks, seeing friends socially, and not having to do work at the house.    (The Baptist church had the best snacks.)

I also got to wander about in the wooded areas that were there.  I'd climb the hill close to our house; sit on the side and look all around the area.  An aerial view is totally different from ground level views. Big things don't seem as intimidating up there.  And the things you could find - arrowheads, "golden rocks," footprints, each thing was an adventure.

There comes a time when you have to stop going to Vacation Bible School, quit the adventures in the woods, and become an adult.  It's really a shame.  I remember that girl.  She actually enjoyed life.  Poor thing.  She didn't know any better.  I wonder what became of her.

Whole or Healed

Being WHOLE can be compared to the Jewish term "SHALOM."   

(Hebrew word meaning peace, completeness, and welfare and can be used idiomatically to mean both hello and goodbye.  As it does in English, it can refer to either peace between two entities (especially between man and God or between two countries), or to the well-being, welfare or safety of an individual or a group of individuals.)

"Shalom" is usually used for the TOTAL aspect of a life.  That is also what the term "WHOLE" means.  Spiritual, Mental, Physical, Financial; whatever is involved in the "Total Person" is included in being WHOLE.  

Being "HEALED" deals with a process.  Where to start?  What to include?  How to accomplish this goal? I have asked for WHOLENESS. I no longer want to just be healed. I want to be WHOLE!  As a child of the Most High God, this is possible.  

I am asking my "ABBA" Father for WHOLENESS.  I am heir to the Kingdom of God.  He loves me and is in control.  I AM WHOLE!

Ode to Ween

When there is no one to turn to - Ween is there
When I need a partner in crime - Ween is there
When there is a need for someone to help finish my meal - Ween is there
Give me a W; Give me an E; Give me another E; Give me an N
What is the sweetest word I hear - WEEN; WEEN; WEEN.


She is playing my "Saran Wrap" lovie.  She hasn't been more than 18 inches from me since I can came home.  She knows when I am sad and puts her head on my lap; when I hurt, she licks where I hurt without being told; she is kind; she is loving; she doesn't ask for much.  She even forgives when I forget to feed and water her.  How much more can you ask from a companion.  It's true.  The more I learn about men, the more I love my dog.

The Week From ?

The week was not the worst of my life, but it was right up there in the top twenty of all rotten times.  I had 4 days of testing due and ending the week in Jacksonville with April 7 being noted.  Everyone knows the saying goes, "Best Laid Plans of Mice and Men often go astray."

Monday was to be a rest day from the "crazy" cruise and visit to EPCOT, etc. That was blown when I discovered I needed to do about a "Gadzillion" errands before I had to leave - pick up a prescription, dog food at the health food store, allergy shots, and the list goes on.

Tuesday tests from the neurologist.  I was there early, made to wait for testing - 45 minutes of listening to the receptionist and the "tester" person eject the Spanish language about a guy that neither one liked, but he was fun sometimes. The actual test took about 20 minutes. Diagnosis was carpal tunnel in both hands, pinched nerve in the neck, and an extreme deficiency of B12. Now I had another errand to get the sublingual B12 tablets.  (It took several stops to find them.)

More errands, wash clothes, drop off Ween to Bob, report to Celebration Hospital for a sleep study.  I had to sleep on my back, which I don't do well, so needless to say, I didn't rest well.  "Escaped" around 5:30, ran home and tried to wash the "glue" out of my hair, dressed for trip to Pasco for the eye specialist.  Also had to pack for the next 4 days as I was going to JAX after St Lukes test.

It took 2 hrs to get to St Lukes, traffic was horrendous on Hillsborough. Arrived around 9:30 for a 10:00 appointment.  After 5 minutes with ear specialist, he said he couldn't test me as I had said "Yes" to one of the questions and it was against the law for him to test me if I answered Yes to any of the questions on the paper I filled out.  Soooooooooooooo, it's 10:05 and my next appointment was 11:00.  After waiting until 11:30, one of the people there dilated my pupils again (which they said they were not going to do) and looked at my pupils again.  I had to wait to see the other doctor.  At 12:30 I decided I was too tired and too sick to deal with these people any more.  I told the receptionist that I had to leave. As I had not eaten all day, I called Vicki and met her at A & W Root Beer to get a hot dog, which sounded wonderful.  She had the girls, but it was great to see them.

My pupils were finally somewhat recovered and I decided to go home.  Called MAYO cancelled my appts and text Aida I wasn't coming.  After almost 2 1/2 hrs of gruelling traffic - wrecks all over I-275 and I-4 in Tampa.  Traffic was backed up over the Howard Franklin South, and way past entrance to I-4 to the North.  What a mess.  I took a "short cut" around Tampa and it only took about 45 minutes.  Outside of Tampa, traffic cleared and I made it to Bob's to pick up Ween in about 1 hr.

Ween and I were so happy to see each other, I went straight home and we both went to bed snuggling.  Thank God I have her.  She is so much company.

We went to Sonny's with Julie and Bret and girls Friday night.  I got sick and haven't felt well since. The last few times I've gone to Sonny's I've gotten sick.  I must eat too much.

My vision isn't good right now.  I don't know what makes the difference but I'm having trouble driving and watching TV.  Even typing this blog, I'm having trouble reading what I'm typing.  It's a good thing I have a spell checker and can touch type.

I don't know what is wrong.  I don't know what needs to be done, but I'm done testing.  I can't do this any more.  God has to do something.

Interesting If Not Enjoyable

Ten years ago I came a home from church and found my husband of 35 years dead on our bedroom floor. I knew my life would change, but I didn't realize how much.

During this time, I've made good choices and some not so good. It has certainly been interesting. In talking with Tom this week he made the statement that it seemed like another lifetime.

 In some ways it was another me and another place and time. In some ways I am not the person I used to be. I can only speculate Who I would have been. Certainly not remarried or maybe not even in Orlando, only God knows for sure. If God lets me live another 10 years, I'm sure that time will also "INTESTING, IF NOT ENJOYABLE.". (That was one of my favorite Tomisms.)