LUMPY

Very young

Have you ever tried to sleep on a lumpy bed?  I don't mean as in "too old to use any more." No, I mean lumpy as in "something has made a large lump in my bed."

I didn't start "letting" her sleep in bed. Bob did. I was gone to a retreat and rather than listen to her yelp, he put her in bed with him to shut her up. Being the little "DIVA" she is, it quickly became HER bed and she lets me sleep there too.

She is my "undercover" doggy.  She starts her "naps" in bed by tunneling under the covers. Actually, she digs "at" the covers and then looks at me. She has trained me to respond by lifting the covers for her to move under them.  To get comfortable, she wiggles her way to the side and pushes her nose out. Sometimes, she pushes out to her chest and it looks like I covered her with the covers.

Much more mature

Annnnd, if that isn't pushy enough, she sleeps SIDEWAYS of the bed.  That leaves me about 6-8 inches on which to sleep.  I don't know about you, but my rear is large than that and I sometimes feel as if I'm fall off the side.

Mock tells me I have created this "monster."  It's probably true. How can you say no to that face? I am such a "push over."

For Such a Time as This

Thirteen years ago,  January 6, I had four front teeth pulled. The vivid image and circumstances that happened are burned into my memory as if it were yesterday.  While I was "resting" after the surgery, a representative of the nursing home called and told me they "found" my dad when they took him his breakfast.  In my groggy state of mind I could not process that information.  I asked what she meant.  Did he fall?  Where did they 'find' my dad?  Did I want her to call my mother?  

I had been my dad's designated health care surrogate for some time.  With that "title" also came responsibility.  I had to make the decisions on any of his health care issues. Ultimately, I also had that responsibility for my mother also.  

Thirty days later, with no front teeth, I stood before a ladies group for a one-day retreat. The emphasis for that retreat was Esther 4:13-14. Haman, an evil advisor to the king, wanted to get rid of the Jews. He tricked the king into making a degree that would have anyone killed that did not bow down to the king. Esther had been selected to be the queen and even though all rules applied to her, the king favored Esther to the extent that he even let her enter the throne room without him sending for her.  (This was also punishable by death.) 

She tried to talk Mordecai out of her going before the king "unannounced." He stood firm.  She must go to persuade the king to reverse his decision.  She reminded Mordecai that "just showing up" to see the king could mean death for her.  He convinced her to go and with her "resounding" statement - "If I perish, I perish" she made herself physically presentable to the king.  

Esther 4:13-14

King James Version (KJV)

¹³ Then Mordecai commanded to answer Esther, Think not with thyself that thou shalt escape in the king's house, more than all the Jews.
¹⁴ For if thou altogether holdest thy peace at this time, then shall their enlargement and deliverance arise to the Jews from another place; but thou and thy father's house shall be destroyed: and who knoweth whether thou art come to the kingdom for such a time as this?

God is not "surprised" by this world. He doesn't look to Earth and say, "Man.  How did that happen?" During a quiet time this week, God reminded me that I also had come to Earth for "such a time as this."  I must get beyond the chaos of co-ordinating the moving of 3 areas of "stuff," of health issues, of money issues or any other "swirling" area of my life, and get on with my tasks for Him.  I am certainly here for "such a time as this."

Closet Lady

On Tuesday, some friends are meeting me at Charles' apartment and they are going to try to finish his packing. Mary and Charles both have been putting things in boxes. He gave his notice of moving for Feb 28. He's moving a bed into my second bedroom and staying here until the house is finished.  My lease was extended until March 31.  My complex is much more flexible with my moving.

The front door and the garage door will be painted soon.  It is exciting to see all the changes being done daily.  This picture shows Ween being introduced to her new front yard. She also did a "nose and butt check" with her new next door doggy neighbor, Amy.  Last time there was snarling and growling.  This time, just sniffing.

The "closet" lady met me at the house to talk about designing the closets.  Fat chance of me forgetting her name - Shiela.  She, of course, spells it wrong, but I'll forgive her after she gets all the work finished.  

The cleaning people arrived and were still working on the "preliminary" cleaning when we left.  Stove isn't in; microwave, dishwasher, and lights have been installed.  The washer and dryer, and the refrigerator were bought separately as the real estate company wanted entirely too much for their versions.  Charles felt it was more productive to spend the money on other upgrades. 

Charles, Holli and  Julie chose some lovely colors - walls, floor tiles, granite tops, and back splash all look so nice.  The granite tops are also IN the bathrooms.  We have "toilets." (WAHOO.)  Little by little it is coming together. The closing date hasn't been changed again so it looks like maybe March 7 WILL be the date.  

God is so good.  Ween and I are excited.  Hard to tell with Charles.

FAT TUESDAY

Tomorrow is the last day of Mardi Gras.  This is, in my opinion, just another day to "do all the sin and degradation" that can be done, and then repent the next day with "sackcloth and ashes."

As I can't usually eat a lot at one meal, consuming massive amounts of food and drink just isn't something I enjoy very much any more.  To me the day means a lot more.

Symbolism of Fat Tuesday, to me, means I'm leaving the "worldly" things behind and entering a period of time that fasting and prayer replace.  I know traditionally the Catholic or Orthodox Churches are the ones who actually use ashes on the forehead to indicate penance.  I would like to attend a service in which I can participate and receive the "Ashes of Repentance."  I haven't found one yet that will allow a "non" member of their church to participate.  And, even if that doesn't happen, I will still observe the traditions of Ash Wednesday.

Someone just needs to see me and realize that I have "sacrificed" very little in my life.  This is probably one of the reasons my "illnesses" have caught up with me, but I want to make Lenten Season especially important this year.  I am beginning another era of my life - the move, the relationship, and the changes.  

After all the chaos of moving three different locations and merging into one, I am "Waiting to Exhale" so to speak. For those who have not seen the movie, this is a period of time when everything eases, settles peacefully down to a rhythm or routine and life becomes enjoyable, maybe for the first time in your life.  For me, it will be another feeling of rest.  It seems as if I have held my breath for so long.  Shabbat Shalom. Pray for peace.

WAXING WISE

What can I do when Ween wakes me at 3:30 am and wants to go potty.  Of course, I let her out.  She comes back inside, jumps up on the bed, goes right back to "sleepy" and I'm wide awake.  As I was trying to return to my blissful position in the bed, eyes wide shut, I started thinking.

Sometimes a dangerous thing for me, my mind "flits" from thing to thing reminding me of the canaries that I have previously mentioned.  It finally rests on the term "LOVE." Why?  Probably because I had some limited "written" exchange with Bob last night.  I admit I initiated it.  I was trying to find out about some groups that will soon be performing at Sea World and I wanted to see them.  (That is a whole different issue.)

Getting back to love, my mind moved on to my money situation.  How did that happen?  Who knows.  But my daily scripture today was "The love of money is the root of all evil." How appropriate for me. God has a way of doing that, doesn't He.  

I don't think I LOVE MONEY.  I KNOW I like what it can do, but have I reallllllllllly trusted God to "supply my needs" or have I been trying to juggle my finances myself?  Well, we all know the answer to that.  I have finally conceded to God I need help.  Not just more money, but help in "massaging" the money I do get each month to use it properly.  That is a big step for me.  I'm waiting for Him to get back to me.

In the meantime, back to love.  God showed me true love yesterday.  A year after Tom died, I found a receipt somewhere in all his "paperwork" that had piled up on his home desk. The "receipt" was from a Jewelry store in Tarpon Springs.  It did not indicated who had given it to Tom or how much it was worth.  I believe it was dated around 1995 or 1996. He had kept it a long time, or maybe it got "conveniently" lost until I was meant to discover it.  

Tarpon Springs is one of my favorite places to visit so I drove to the store and asked if the receipt was still valid. They assured me it was.  I asked to see what I could get for the amount only they knew. It just said it was worth a gift at this store.  I asked what I could get for the amount.  They showed me a display of beautiful items.  One "popped" out at me - a lovely pair of "Greek Key" earrings.  I had to have them. And, that is how Tom gave me a pair of earrings for his first year anniversary in heaven. Naturally, these earrings mean so very much to me.  When I wear them I think of him and smile.  

Yesterday, I accidently dropped a portion of a towel in the toilet and lifted it out, wrapped it up and laid it on the area beside the sink to later wash it.  When I was getting ready to wash it I "jerked" it off the sink and took it to the washer. When I returned to the bathroom, I saw ONE of my precious earrings on the floor, beside the tub.  I was panicked when I couldn't find the other one.  I shook the towel, got on my hands and knees, looked all around - even in my bedroom. NOTHING. I had a drs appt and had to leave.  I would return to the search later.

When I got home, I began my search again. NOTHING.  I cried out - "Oh dear God, if you love me at all, please don't let me lose this precious item.  They mean so much to me." I knew God loved me.  I have never doubted that but I was desperate.  

The quiet, still voice inside my head said, "What about the garbage?"  I don't know about you, but I DO NOT LIKE RUMMAGING THROUGH GARBAGE, even in the bathroom where it is relatively "clean."  So I didn't. I kept "fruitlessly" going over and over all the items in the bathroom.

I cried out again, "Please don't do this to me.  I really can't lose that earring." Again, the question - What about the garbage.  As a last resort, I picked up the trash can and started switching the tissues, etc to the sink.  There nestled within a tissue shining like I have never seen it, was that lost earring.

Does God love me?  Of course He does.  That has never been the question.  The question is - Do I love Him enough to trust Him with all my life?  I'm trying harder today to do just that.

It's a God Thring

When God makes things happen, it is so neat to me.  I have always "valued" the teaching abilities of Joesph Stowell, former President of Moody College.  I read his books.  I try to hear him when I can. I had not thought about him probably since he left Moody, but his name came to mind Sunday evening and I decided to try to find him.  It wasn't hard.  He's still writing and working for The Lord.

His schedule listed him as conference speaker at the OMNI Hotel  in Orlando, FL on February 6.  Wow.  I signed up for the evening meeting, hoping to be able to go.  Unfortunately, I am not supposed to drive at night because of my vision problems.  I knew I would have to have someone to take me.  Mock is working. Charles called today and said he had to be at MK tomorrow at 4:00 am for a photo shoot, so he had to go to bed early. (In other words, he couldn't take me.).  I was not able to go.

But God is so neat.  Guess who was the guest speaker on Day of Discovery tonight.  Yep, that's right - Joseph Stowell.  Isn't God awesome.  I couldn't go to Joe Stowell so God brought him to me.  WOW! He must really love me.

Celi

Meeting my new neighbors was an event this am.  Nauni and Celi, Mom and daughter; doggy Amy.  Amy and Ween were not exactly "BFF" to start, but I'm sure they learn to love each other.

Nauni sounds like a great cook AND, she is a hairdresser. Can this be more perfect.  Celi is in 5th grade and another daughter "Antoinella (sp) is about 1+.  Seem like great people and I hope we will be good friends.  Their house is to the right of ours.

We have paint.  Nice.  Grass and Shutters are coming tomorrow, per Ross (Contractor).  Julie says signing date has been pushed back to March 7.  Oh well.  It is what it is.

The inside has been painted a "creme" color; about the color of the trim on the outside. Charles hasn't decided whether to repaint before we move in or not.  Holli says they usually use cheap paint and that it would be a good idea to have it repainted.  We'll see.

Ween found a "Weiner" window in our bedroom.  She can jump up on the window sill and look out. Just her size. Probably need to put some sort of covering there; maybe slate or marble.  Not a bad idea to add it to all the windows because they are low and once she knows she can "peep" she will do it all over, and scratched walls will not look nice.

I may try to go back out to the house tomorrow to see all the new installs.  Nauni said she was there every day. I can't go EVERY day, but it's exciting to see when there are changes. I am so blessed.

TWEAKED

A little "incident" Thursday sent me to my "wonderful" Dr Filart.  He is so amazing (but that's another issue.)  I kind of "fell" face down into the carpet.  I have had some issues with vertigo, especially within the last two weeks. I had reached down to pick up Ween's food bowl and kept on going.  I can't tell if I pass out or the equilibrium changes too rapidly. Anyway, the "magic wand" of the pacemaker checked all the info that was downloaded.  It seems to be doing it's job, but needed to be "TWEAKED" a little. I don't think that is a "medical" term but the Tech Dr used the term.

It's amazing what that machine can do and what it tells the Dr.  My meds were changed with the "tweak."  I'm still having some vertigo, but it could be inner ear.  I started taking Benedryl yesterday and if it isn't any better by Monday, I'll go see my allergist to have it checked. (I hate falling apart.)

Charles had to go to the house to measure for refrigerator and w/d so I went with him.  Most doors have been hung, and baseboards installed. It's coming along.  I'm just too anxious, I guess.  He's getting those appliances separate because it was cheaper to do it that way.  He has such a great mind for evaluating situations, and with the help of Julie and Holli, most everything has been considered.  {I am so blessed.}

Canaries again

Our weather has been so "perfect" lately, I guess the canaries think it's spring again.  It's amazing how they flit and soar.  They don't seem to bother Ween, but let one squirrel run down the fence and she's a maniac. I don't think she could catch one, and I don't know what she would do IF she caught one, but she almost goes through the sliding glass door.

Took Mock to see the new house.  He said he liked it. What could he say? It is going to be nice.  I think this is one of the "waiting" times.  It's seemingly finished up to a point, so I'm guessing they must be waiting for some sort of inspection.

Inside framing

It seems smaller than what I have now, so I don't know how much furniture I will be able to keep.  We also have the Guest Room that needs some furniture.  I think I might have to switch to a double bed instead of my queen.  We'll see.

Kitchen, living room, dining room

The extra room is about the same size, so we'll have to compromise what goes in there too.

Supposedly, when they reach this level, it's about 30 days until closing. I hope that is true.  Charles has to contact the contractor and find out. No doors on garage or doorway into house from garage.  They will have to be put on before any other inside items can be added.

Garage

(These pictures were taken BEFORE wall board was done.  I couldn't remember where I had put them.)

God has been so good to us.  I SHOULD get my income tax money soon, so that will help me to be able to get things paid.  I'm so excited to see what God is going to do next.

House, etc.

Even after spending so much time on drapes yesterday, Holly went to the material store and saw another fabric she liked better.  She is so unbelievably talented.

Please pray for Julie, my "adopted" daughter-in-law.  He sister Lisa died last night.  She was in the hospital earlier in the week with "gastritis's" supposedly.  I don't know, but I'd want an autopsy if I were her family. They are not sure why she died.

On a lighter note, Ween went out today and didn't come back from her "Potty" break.  I had to go find her and there she was-laying in the grass, just enjoying the wonderful sunshine.  She will LOVE the new yard.  I will love it too.

The weather here is so nice.  This is why I live in Florida.

House (coming along)

Having spent over 2 hours today at the house was exhausting for me.  (I just watched and asked dumb questions.)  I'm so glad Holly and Julie are in charge.  I don't know enough to ask questions, or at least intelligent ones.

Here Holly is discussing what type of drapes we need for the living/dining/kitchen area.  She was busy measuring in the model home.

The next picture is of the entrance and hallway from the inside.  Holly recommends a small table and art work at the entrance.  

We are blessed with pictures - Brett and Julie gave us 5 matted and framed "BEAUTIFUL" prints for Christmas. And, Charles' friend Nancy gave him 3 prints and we have some, so I think we're all set for wall hangings.  Holly will look at everything and "know" where each should go. (She has such a gift.)

I can't say enough good things about Holly.  She is "miraculous" and marvelous.  And, with Julie's knowledge of the Real Estate business, we are so blessed. We couldn't afford their expertise.  I'm so glad they are helping.

This picture doesn't show it, but we have a driveway and walkway into the house.  I'll try to get another front view of the house and put it in a note.

My friend Vicki is doing so well.  She just had  the surgery on her lung.  The Dr said he took a little more around the edge of the spot.  He said now she is cancer free.  He hasn't mentioned any kemo or radiation.  It is truly all due to the prayers for her. GOD IS GOOD; ALL THE TIME.

I'm having some afib with my heart.  I guess it's the excitement of moving.  God has worked out so much.  I couldn't even begin to write about all of it.  I will continue to add information throughout my blogs.  We are praising God for all of the wonderful things He's doing; even for the ones we DON'T know about.

House Focus

Ween and I visited the house today.  We're so excited. The studs are in but no walls have been started.  The shingles have been stacked on the roof and the house IS progressing, so we will see how fast they can finish.

Picture of the back of the house looks interesting too. The "three windows" are the living room, kitchen area, and the two are Charles' bedroom.  I can hardly wait for all the work to be done.  

Kelly is doing a great job of coordinating everything. I don't know what we would have done without her.  I know what I like, but I certainly don't know how to put it together.  I'm glad someone has a sense of style.

One of my "smoke alarms" is beeping and it is after 6 on a Sunday evening.  I can't get anyone to change it this late.  I DID send an email to Mock.  Hopefully he can come over tonight after work and "disconnect or change the battery. Ween is "hiding" in my closet.  It hurts her ears too.

Every day is a new adventure.  Every week a new road in my life.  It's interesting.

Living in Florida

Eighty-degree weather in  January is only one of the reasons I live in Florida. Even though it's beautiful here now, I absolutely hate leaving my apartment.  I use to be on the go almost 24/7, but not any more.   

This week has been unusually busy.  Two doctors appointments - one good and one not so much.  Dr Bourne was okay with my blood work.  Thyroid needs just a little "tweaking" for now.  Modifying meds a tiny bit will help.  Dr LeFrans' visit not so good.  Blood clotting too low - 1.7. Needs to be at least 2.  Pacemaker reading shows too much stress on my heart that is why I'm getting some Afib even with pacemaker.  The difference is that the pacemaker slows it down to normal when that happens.  I am thankful for that.

Charles left for a WDW cruise with friends; Barb is to be in Florida soon.  She just text.  Her flight has been delayed, so she's not sure when she will be here.  She is also going on a cruise - Sunday to Sunday.  I hope to see her when she comes back.  

The house is coming along.  We're to do some sort of inspection on Monday or Tuesday.  I want to write scriptures on the inside of the walls.  We did that for Metro Church when it was being rebuilt.  I like the idea and I asked Charles and Julie to help me.  

I have to pick up 2 Rx at Target, plus a few groceries and I'll be done for the week, I think. 

Just another beautiful day in paradise.

Ordinal, Cardinal or Catholic

 Animals

• Cardinal (bird) or Cardinalidae, a family of North and South American birds
• Paroaria, a South American genus of birds
• Argynnis pandora, a species of butterfly
• Cardinal tetra, a freshwater fish

[edit]Christianity

• Cardinal (Catholicism), a senior official of the Catholic Church
• Cardinal (Church of England)

[edit]Entertainment

• Cardinal (album), a 1994 album by indie pop duo, Cardinal
• The Cardinals, a 1950s R&B group
• The Cardinals (rock band), a group formed in 2003
• The Cardinal (play), a Caroline era tragedy by James Shirley
• The Cardinal (1936 film), a British historical drama
• The Cardinal, a 1963 American film
• Cardinal (film), a 2001 American film directed by Michael Harring

[edit]Geography

• Cardinal, Ontario, Canada
• Cardinal, Virginia

[edit]Navigation and transport

• Cardinal (train)
• The Cardinal (railcar)
• Cardinal mark, a sea mark used in navigation
• Cardinal direction, the four primary directions N, S, E, and W
• Cessna 177 Cardinal, a single engine aircraft
• St. Louis Cardinal C-2-110, a light aircraft built in 1928

[edit]Organizations

• Cardinal Brewery, a brewery founded in 1788 by François Piller, located in Fribourg, Switzerland
• Cardinal Health, a health care services company
• Cardinal High School (Middlefield, Ohio), a public high school in Middlefield, Ohio, Geauga County, United States

[edit]Sports

• Arizona Cardinals, an American professional football team
• Assindia Cardinals, an American football club from Essen, Germany
• Ball State Cardinals, the athletic teams of Ball State University
• Cardenales de Lara, a Venezuelan baseball team
• Catholic University Cardinals, the athletic teams of the Catholic University of America
• Lamar Cardinals, the athletic teams of Lamar University in Beaumont, Texas, USA
• Louisville Cardinals, the athletic teams of University of Louisville
• Mapúa Cardinals, the athletic teams of Mapúa Institute of Technology
• St. Louis Cardinals, an American professional baseball team
• Stanford Cardinal, the athletic teams of Stanford University
• Wesleyan Cardinals, the athletic teams of Wesleyan University
• West Perth Football Club, an Australian rules football club in Western Australia
• Woking F.C., an English association football team

[edit]Other

• Cardinal (name)
• Cardinal (color), a vivid red
• Cardinal (grape), a table grape first produced in California in 1939
• Cardinal number, a concept in mathematics

As you can see, there are so many uses of the word Cardinal. I was amazed this morning to see this vibrant, "fire engine" red, living creature on the fence outside my apartment. He was beyond BEAUTIFUL.  

He quickly caught my eye, as he would with anyone. He stretched to his highest point he could reach, and then settled back down. Beside him, for males are the most beautiful, was a drab, brownish red, smaller female. Nothing notable about her except she was with him.  Her intense stare was seemingly ignored by the "beautiful one."  He stayed for only a moment, but his presence was intense. Even Ween stared at him. As he left his make-shift perch, she followed silently.

BUSY BUSY BUSY

The holidays are usually very busy and this year is no different.  My son, Tom, and his partner, Ty, visited from California; Edward came over from St Pete, and we partied for Tom's birthday.  Jikos, Sonnys, Pei Wai, Olive Garden, and Chick-fil-et are just some of the restaurants we frequented.  I "cooked" for Christmas Day.  Actually, I got things ready and Tom finished when they came over for lunch.  Not my usually, Christmas dinner or decorations, but we were together, and that was so meaningful to me.

Tom and Ty stayed at DAK Lodge for a night; visited DAK and even rested some.  Edward stayed with me while here as he also brought Joey, his Lab/Chow.  Wiener was a brat to Joey, but he lived through it. I hate her acting so mean but she's a spoiled Princess.  What can I say. Mock says I'm to blame, and he's probably right.

Being blessed, I received some nice presents and enjoyed the company.  It was great to have everyone, but it was more than I had done in a long time, so I was physically exhausted and even got a cold some time during the visits. I wasn't able to "go" with everyone, but hopefully next year will be easier.

They have finally broken ground on the house.  It seems so long for me, but I suppose it is just my eagerness to move and have it over with.  I know it's going to be great and I like living with Charles.  I hope Ween isn't too much for him.

Mary is out of town right now, but will be back soon.  I miss her when she doesn't visit with me.  She is such an "upper" in spirit and energy.  I am so blessed to have her as a friend.

Ween is sleeping off her "doggie food" she just ate and relaxes so completely that she doesn't even know when I get off the couch.  She takes good care of "Mommy."  I am truly blessed.

ADDITIONS

The canaries have been joined by the sparrows and a phenomenally beautiful cardinal.  He flits between watching and dancing; strutting and jumping; stretching and scooting down the fence.  I haven't seen a girlfriend, but I'm sure he will attract someone soon.  He sparkles with that beautiful red coat adding to the dreary leafless bushes that have already covered the preserve behind my apartment.  I'm watching from afar yet he seems to know I'm here.  He looks directly at the patio door.  He doesn't seem scared but intensely scouts the area for "intruders?" or maybe just a place to build that nest he's anticipating.  

Do humans act this way?  Yeah, maybe.  Men strut and women hide; men know that the home building is their responsibility, but not until they have scouted the area.  Is he marriage material?  Who knows until that "ONE" will come along.  Is he ready?  Who knows; not even he is aware of when and where.

My life has been reduced to bird watching and evaluating the "outdoor critters."  Sad?  Not really.  It is relaxing and uplifting to watch the outdoors just "happen."  They are so free and unaware of any danger.  I will miss this view.

Overcast

As I look out the patio door which has become my view of the world, I see a "herd" of canaries flipping around busily building, singing, and just "doing their thing." They seem so happy and committed to their work, whatever it is. They are probably here because of the cold up north and they seem to be settling into this area.

Sometimes I would like to be as free - just to fly anywhere, anytime; no cares; no worries. I would miss my family, even with all the drama they bring.

Here it is Christmas again; a sacred time; a Holy time.  I don't need anything except my car washed and some gas, but tradition has it that presents must be exchanged and parties must go on.  No. I won't be doing that much this year. I'm not even decorating.  Physically can't; emotionally don't want to, or financially not possible so, we'll see.

Through it all, God's Son was born.  Let's celebrate.

KNOTAZOU

Disney's Animal Kingdom advertises that they are  KNOTAZOU. or Not a zoo. I sometimes feel as if I need to shout that about my life - it just seems SEEMS like a one.  I plan such good plans; follow such wonderful layouts, and it still turns out crazy.

Saw Dr Filart yesterday.  He did an EKG, x-ray, and a "sh" test.  He thinks I may have pneumonia. The EKG looked great.  My heart beat is steady and even.  No more Afib.  The x-ray and "sh" test revealed a "nearly frozen" diaphragm, which explains why I can't breathe properly.  The right side is about 2 inches higher than the left side. I don't know much about that condition but I know today is not a good day.  The nausea is still continuing and should have stopped.  I'm taking so much medication that it could also be the problem.  I'm sure that I am able to give Walgreens a run for their money matching pill to pill.  

Losing weight seems the most logical cure to all the problems.  That isn't a problem right now - everything is tasteless.  

Ween took a little "jaunt" around the apartments today.  She has this "cutesy" little act she does by leaving by the patio doors, and makes her way around the side of the building to the front door.  She thinks that is so cute.  She's much too smart.  Right now I don't feel like walking her so the only option is to allow her to go out by herself.  Against the rules here, but I haven't much choice right now.  So far, she's stayed close.  She's very nosy thought.

I haven't any idea how this "physical" body will end up but I still believe God is in control.  That comforts me.

OKAY

Days are passing and I'm feeling much better.  Have developed a "viral infection," blisters on my tongue, and still some "tummy trouble."  Incisions are healing.  I'm trying to get an appointment w/my doctor for follow up.  He is so busy.  I don't know how he has time to breathe.  The problem is that he cares for his patients.

Ween is still clingy and doesn't want me to leave her eyesight.  I have managed to redirect her attention when she wants to get on the furniture. She's almost to the point she doesn't even ask any more.  She will be so thrilled with having her own yard.  The weather is cooler and she loves being outside.

I'm getting cabin fever from being inside so long.  Ween is mostly the only "human" I talk with each day.  She looks like she's interested, especially when I'm eating something.  I wonder.  DOES SHE LOOK INTERESTED ONLY BECAUSE I AM HER FOOD SOURCE? Hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.

I DO have a nurse that visits 3x a week.  She comes to check my vitals and blood level.  Cute little oriental lady that goes through every procedure each time and makes the same recommendations for me each time.  I just nod and say  "sure" "okay" or shake my head.  It makes her happy.

Today is another day or recouping.  I'm glad to be home.

Second Day

This is my second day home.  I haven't mastered the art of keeping my food down yet, but I'm working toward that goal.

The eval nurse was here, took off old bandages, let me take a shower, put new bandages, and checked all my vitals.  Low blood pressure, but its been low for a while.  She came to make an eval of how much help I need.  My nurse, Rose, will be here tomorrow to check my clotting level. If its good, I will not have to take shots again.  It needs to be 2-3. When it was last checked, it was 1.9 so I'm almost there.  It needs to be thin when I don't have any procedures done; thicker when there are some to be done.

Also blood count is a little low.  I have some sort of blisters in my mouth, indicating what I don't know.  I have to get an appointment tomorrow w regular dr to see what is going on now.

I should have a "PHD" in visiting drs.   If I had known I was going to live this long I would have taken better care off this body.

Some wonderful friends stayed with Ween while I was in the "big house." Heidi and David were coming to visit Orlando, and they agreed to stay here so I wouldn't have to board her.  She was so calm and low keyed when I got home.  That was good. I thought they had drugged her. (Probably just tired from all the partying.) When I came home I gave her part of a Arby's roast beef. After she ate, she put herself to bed and slept from around 3:00 to 7:30. Being so cute is hard work.( She is so spoiled.)

We're watching another ball game, OR the ME of we is -  NY v Green Bay. Ween is sleeping, of course.  So far it's been very boring.  Up the field; score. Down the infield; score. Boring!

Busy tomorrow. I'm working toward getting better. What will I ever do when I don't need to spend time visiting waiting rooms.  I should call some agency.  I could be their "scrounging around person" and check out the place.  "Board of Health?"  I guess not.