Rain, Rain

Today is an especially nice day to stay indoors.  Our much needed rain has finally arrived in Orlando.  My view from the couch, out my patio doors, gives me a very green view of the "flora and fauna" that is on the property.

Ween is terribly distressed at the water all around.  She loves baths but hates rain.  Go figure.

Mock has had a busy day today.  After sleeping two hours, he had an 8:00 am breathing test at the hospital.  Came home and tired to sleep a few hours.  On to pick up a friend who needs to return a u-haul she used to move, and then take her to her new place which is not really close to anywhere.  He is planning to go to work from there.  He is extremely "crabby" when he doesn't get sleep.  (I hope he doesn't get fired today.)

My "relative" is taking me shopping tomorrow.  I'm still in a "resting" mode and can't drive.  That is really annoying.  I don't think that is a "control" issue, but it sure is limiting to where and when you can go some where.  I'm really getting tired of it.  I can't even imagine how he feels taking me everywhere.

We go to Mayo on Tuesday.  He is driving.  This is a great inconvenience for him.  He hasn't complained once.  He hasn't even indicated that he doesn't like doing it.  I so appreciate him.  Maybe I'll be able to drive soon.  That would really be nice.  Ween agrees.

PaPa John's or Dominoes?

Being on hold  for about 20 minutes, aggravates me.  It seems like every time I place an on-line pizza order, it has something wrong and it takes an act of Congress to get it straightened out.  I finally had to call an 877 number and talk with a "trouble shooter" for Papa John's.  He was very polite and even offered to send me extra garlic sauce for my inconvenience.  The next great adventure is to see if it REALLY comes like I ordered it.

Ween has slept through the ordeal.  She raised her head once, gave me a dirty look, and decided it wasn't worth her effort.  I told you she is smart. Her motto - "Never get excited unless it involves food and I can smell it."

Mock went to get some sodas since Papa John's has Pepsi not Coke.  It is heresy to even mention anything but Coke.  Some people are so picky.

Another rest day today.  I have my blood checked tomorrow.  Mock is taking me.  After all that excitement,  we get to go to his doctor.  I tell you, if it wasn't for trips to the doctor or a hospital, I'd have no social life.  I wonder if I can somehow spin all the visiting into a paying job?  Hummmmm.

Day Off

Most people have Memorial Day off from work.  I wonder if they know why? When I was in the "wonderful world of education", the kids only knew they didn't have to go to school.  After trying to explain why this date was important, I usually got the response "Whatever."

IF I were teaching again, I would change some things.  I would teach phonics and spelling to every class; celebrate EVERY possible holiday; make each student feel more important; try to make them smile; and, enjoy each day.  

I have a lot of things I would do differently, if I could have a "redo" in my personal life.  I know I'd be a better wife and tell my husband how wonderful he was every single day.  Feeling I was too hard on my children, I would try to "back off" from all the rules and regulations and enjoy them more.  I'd try to ignore unimportant things and emphasize the good times even more. I'd try to be more aware of people's feelings and emotions.  I'd try to be nice to everyone.

I have heard some people say they have no regrets about their life.  I wish I could say that, but I try not to focus on the things I did wrong.  I have so many "right" people and things in my life.  "Someone" went to some one's house for lunch today and brought back a  "humongous" amount of food.  I've only been able to eat the rice and beans so far, but the chicken, potato salad and the watermelon all look good too.  He even brought me some Tylenol as I can't take aspirin any more.  See.  I know that I am blessed, and I never have doubted that for one moment.

Home at Last, Again

After three and a half days in an extremely nice hospital, I was "sprung" from the joint.  They finally did the endoscopy this morning and found 2 ulcers in my stomach - one on the side and one in the bottom.  That will take care of the bleeding and I'm back on coumadin as of this evening, only at a lower dose. Dr Martin thinks I should still be on it because of the thickness of my blood. (If I had know I would have needed this body this long, I would have taken better care of it.)

Ween is so "thrilled" to have me home.  She has done her happy dance, licked me all over, and is now resting from the exhaustion.  That is the most exercise she has had in many days.  She has assumed her position at the end of the couch, just two feet from me.  She doesn't want me to do anything without her, especially eating.

I must rest now.  Long day for me; up at 4:30 - blood work, and it only went downhill from there.  I can hardly wait to see what she is fixing for dinner.

STALLED

No news is supposed to be good news; Not necessarily true. I am still in the hospital, still not able to do procedure. Dr said he has no problem doing it on Sat. 


The number has come down, but not enough yet. So, I'm "Resting" again today. 


I really miss Ween. I'm sure she misses me too. Hopefully I will able to go home tomorrow, if they do the procedure early. In the meantime, I'm connecting the bruises as a pastime.

Here We Go Again

I hate to be repitious but, I'm back in the hospital. I have one of those lifetimes, it seems, that lately has gone from one direction to rapidly changing to another. It seems fairly simple to go to the doctor to have your blood checked, and yet lands you in the hospital. 


I'm beginning to believe that I am missing the message. I don't know what is, but I'd love to know. I have promised God that I am totally clueless as to what He wants me to do. He already knows that but I'm willing to do Whatever I'm supposed to do, just let me know what it could be. 


Yep. Here I am. This time is something a little different. I'm having some internal bleeding and my doctor doesn't want to take any chances while I'm taking the Coumadin. He also put me back on the "heart" menu here. It really isn't bad, but not what I wanted. Oh ok. Whatever. I'm hoping I won't be here long. 


Poor Ween. She's so confused as to what I'm doing. Home a few days, gone a few days. She's not the only one confused. Already told me they are doing an endoscopy. Dr Martin just in and not doing the testing until Friday. My blood count has dropped and he wants my blood "numbers" to stabilize. 


I apologize for this typing as I am using the iPad and I'm not so familiar with this keyboard. I will continue to blog about the everyday rantings and ramblings. This doesn't change the type either so, enjoy.

Italy

Seeing old friends is great until I see their children have grown "like weeds," as my mother would have said.  The oldest child, Samantha, is now going into 8th grade.  She's taller than her mother.  Michael, the middle child, is still Michael, and Giada is in charge of everyone.  (She resembles her mother in a lot of ways.)

Aunt Jenny was with them and I met two new members of her family - Matt, Trisha's brother and Steve, Matt's partner.  Lovely people and enjoyed the evening.

The food was not as tasty as I expected.  This is a new Italian addition where they had made reservations.  The calamari was rubbery; the veal overdone; the stuffed mushrooms dried out; but the spaghetti and potatoes were good. I must have found something to eat as I was too full to order a delicious looking dessert.  Today they are eating at Morocco, one of my favorite places to eat.  MMmmmmm.  I would love to join them for this one.

Today includes a check-up of my blood.  Mock has a CAT scan scheduled.  Full afternoon.  We'll probably stop at the store to use my gift card.  It's a good thing I have generous friends and relatives.  They know me so well, and that is usually a good thing.

Another day; Same couch

Having only a cell phone and no land line, I seldom have weird calls of advertising or wanting to give me something.  I had a call earlier that wanted to give me $7,000 from the "government of the United States."  I was interested.  The voice was male with an East Indian accent.  Bottom line is IF I go to a Western Union and send them 250.00 then they will release the $7,000 to my account.  Hmmmmm.  A, I don't think so.  I just told him I couldn't drive to go to the Western Union office.  And, that is true.  I DIDN'T tell him I didn't have 250.00 to give him.  I probably should have told him.  I wonder what he would have said if I had said that.  Oh well.

It's another day of holding down the couch for Ween and me.  Actually she is laying in front of the sliding glass door soaking up some sun.  That is as close as she wants to be to the outdoors, unless of course the squirrel comes by or the duck visits.  That is a totally different story.

I'm resting again today.  We do have a dinner resv with friends from NY.  It's at Italy in EPCOT, and as long as I feel okay I will probably go.  They are a neat couple with 3 lovely children.  We try to see them when in NY and visa versa for them here.  We'll see how that goes.

Somehow I have misplaced my recording sheet for my daily vitals.  I'm hoping that Rose has picked it up in her stuff.  If not, the machine retains the information and I'll have to start another one.  I'll make Ween write it down. She's okay as long as it doesn't require a thumb.  Then her writing gets a little sloppy.  I'll just have to deal with it.  Life is so hard.

AH, FRIENDS

Probably the two people on this earth who have known me the longest are Mary and Byron.  Tom and Byron were friends for some time when I was admitted to the group.

It was college; Tom and I started dating; he introduced me to his friend, and then I met his friend's wife.  Any complimentary word you can think of, pertains to Mary.  Talented, sweet, knowledgeable, etc.  I could go on and on. Her personality was the opposite of mine - she was quiet, unassuming, only talked to answer questions, a lot like Tom.  Byron on the other hand was outgoing, bubbly, always ready to talk about anything. We seemed to fit together - Tom and Mary - quiet; Byron and me - not so much. 

This weekend "the relative I can't mention" said he wanted to go to Tallahassee to see some friends.  Mary and Byron live close to his friends so I asked if I could tag along.  The last time I was at their home, same location, was about a year ago.  It was pitch black dark and I had a hard time finding it as my Garmin didn't work well in that area.  

Mock tried our GPS on our phone to see where I was and it indicated I was in the middle of the woods with only dirt roads around.  He asked if I was camping out.  [Anyone who knows me knows that I would only camp out at the Grand Floridian at Disney.  Mock thought he was being funny. (HA)]

Dropped off with Mary and Byron and yes, Lucky their golden.  It is always so great to see them.  They know me and still love me; Now that is a friend.  We talked and talked.  Memories.  Byron cooked the most delicious dinner.  I have always loved his cooking.  Mary is no slouch at cooking but Byron puts such "flair" in his presentations and he explains how each  item is prepared; there's always a Byron twist on each item.  Baked chicken, field peas, baked potatoes, candied carrots, salad, AND a dessert to die for - angel food cake, pudding, whipped cream and strawberries.  I think it is called a trifle, but it was a type of parfait in layers and WOW, so good.  And the cappuccino, oh my goodness were they delicious too.

They have been on Weight Watchers for some time and lost a "ton of weight." Mary is probably the smallest she has ever been, or at least since I've known her.  They both look good and if they eat like they fed me, it's all good.  I also had breakfast with my son's friends.  It has been a long time since I've seen them.  And, then we had to come home.

I can hardly move today.  It seems when I try to do activities for a whole day, it wears me out for the next day or two.  So, Ween and I are holding down the couch and bed today.  She is playing "Saran Wrap" and if I move she jumps up to go with me.  Ever have anyone watch you go to the bathroom?  

Love/Hate Relationship

Wiener is a wonderful companion, most of the time.  She snuggles, keeps the house safe from the lawn mowers and weed whackers of the world, shows affection by licking almost everywhere on your body, and sleeps as much as I do.

Every once in a while though, she just aggravates me to death.  She's pushy, impatient, begs for food, NEEDS attention, and sometimes leaves little "oopsies" on the carpet.  I had a queen-sized bed that didn't have enough room for her. She wants to sleep beside you, yet kicks with both feet when she wants more room. If she turns over and scoots off the bed or couch, she gives you a look of disgust and thinks you pushed her. If she doesn't like when I tell her no, she "SNORTS" at me and huffs off.  And, don't even get me started on her revenge mode.  Mock says I created her "Monster" behavior.  I tend to think she was born this way.

I need my beauty sleep

Talking with other Daschund families, the overall breed responds with similar behaviors.  According to most books I've read, they were bred to hunt badgers for farmers in Germany.  They would viciously retrieve the badgers from underground to rid the farms of the scavengers.  This explains their tunneling and able to sleep and breathe under the covers.

I'd just like to know what explains their attitude problems.  This is something that is quite evident in most of the ones I've seen.  Wiener goes after most any other dog, regardless of size.  Most of the time, this is okay.  But, I wouldn't ask her about a "ginormous" malamute she once encountered.  It was not pretty and you really don't want to encounter her disdain.  It would really help if you show up with treats.  She works well for food.

Today

Yesterday came and went.  Lunch with Ruth and Carol; Dr's appt. All my vital signs are being monitored and everything was going nicely.  About one am this morning, my heart decided to start "tap dancing."  All my medical people tell me to document, document, document.  I was in bed, watching TV, when it started.  Nothing exciting going on; could not tell why it started.


I finally fell asleep, exhausted, around 3.  (It makes me tired.)  I woke up around 6:30 - heart still "dancing."  (Gene Kelly would have been jealous.)  I DID document the incidences on my heart monitor.  I have been wearing it for several days.  This is the first time it has been documented by a monitor.  I spaced the recordings about 4 hrs apart.  


I got up and worked on the computer for about an hour; heart still dancing.  It doesn't usually hurt but extremely annoying and tiring.


The "other" vital-sign monitor went off at 9:00.  The heart beat was 93, and it is usually around 65 each am.  Otherwise, everything else was okay.  After transmitting the vital machine info, I called the heart monitor company and transmitted my heart activities. They saw the arrhythmia and was supposed to call the Dr's office.  It is 4:30 and I haven't heard from anyone.


By 11:00 I was worn out and went back to bed.  (Ween was right beside me all morning.) When I woke up around 3:30, my heart was beating regularly and I felt fine


This is the first time that the dancing has happened in a while.  It can't be determined why it starts or why it stops, or what is causing it.  Who knows - it could be most anything.  I pray that is all for now.  I want to go to Tallahassee to see Mary and Byron. Ween will not be happy being left at home.  Oh well.  Mock will have to deal with her, until I come back.

Red Lobster or Olive Garden

A thin little blond-headed girl, about five years old, walked up to me, stretched out her hand, and said, "Hi.  I'm Lynn Uxxxxxx, and I am in your Kindergarten class."  Little did I know on that day in 1980 that this little girl's mother and I would become the best of friends.


Ruth is a tremendous person with much knowledge and talent.  She has a music degree, was the main programmer for Pasco County Library System, and has battled cancer. She's one of the smartest and bravest people I know. 


I knew her Mom and Dad.  Sweet people.  Her mother, also named Ruth, was blind and lived with Ruth and Jim the last few years of her life.  Jim and Tom were colleagues as they both were in the music departments of the school systems. Our lives intertwined in so many ways over those last few years.  We have marvelous memories.  As we recalled some today, we had to laugh out loud.


Lunch today was at the Red Lobster in DTD.  Ruth and Carol, a childhood friend of Ruth's, came here to meet me for lunch. As I am in a "stay put" mode, they graciously offered to drive over here and even brought me home after we ate. Once again, I am so blessed with marvelous friends.


"Does it hurt to have sex?"  Ruth's 2nd grade granddaughter asked her mother.  Ruth said Lynn almost ran off the road when Alex asked her that.  It brought back a "similar" embarassing moment with Lynn. 


Ruth was pregnant with her second child when I met her. Sarah was born during Lynn's year in Kindergarten.  Ruth and Jim, being fairly progressive parents allowed Lynn to be present during the birth.  Of course, Lynn had a new experience for "SHOW AND TELL" the next day. She could have taught the class on the delivery.  Her terms were correct and the vivid verbal account of the birth was so detailed that I felt I had to let the other parents know about the new bit of knowledge we learned in Kindergarten that day.  See Lynn.  Paybacks.  I loved it.

I Remember

The week before Tom died he got to see both of his sons-Tommy on Thursday and Charles on Sat.  Both were seemingly accidental.  I believe it was one of those "God Things."

Tommy's vacuum broke and he needed to borrow ours.

("BORROW" is an interesting word, especially in my family.  Yes, the normal definition of borrow is "to obtain or receive something with the understanding of returning the item." The definition is not so literal in my family.  Borrow seems to mean "get the item and conveniently forget to return it."  And, it's okay because it's family.)  Tom took Tommy our vacuum when Tom went to a county band practice in St Pete Thursday night.  I think they even ate dinner together.

The week-end before was my mother's birthday.  Our schedules were so crazy that we planned to celebrate on April 7 at the Don Caesar Resort in St Pete. Tommy had made reservations.

Charles had a prior commitment for Sunday, so he came over on Sat and took us to lunch.  Tom got to spend time with him that day.

Tom was so proud of his sons.  They both are sons that most parents could only dream of having.  They're intelligent, talented, leaders in their field of choice, and they are good to their mother.

As we approach this year's Mother's Day, I thank God for my sons, and yes for the additionally acquired three men that have come to mean so much to me. Lucky?  Not at all.  TRULY BLESSED.

Not Exactly

Starting at 8:30, Julie showed up to take me to my first meeting with my allergist.  I didn't get to see my regular doctor, but the other doctor diagnosed a sinus infection and gave me 3 Rx; on to my next stop.  Chamberlins Health Food store for doggy food for Wiener; Post Office to mail a thank you card. Time for brunch at Mimis.  Quiche and toast, yum.

Off again to Publix to get a few groceries and drop off Rxs.  Their antibiotics are free. Of the other two, the eye drops were $120.00.  You can almost get new glasses for that.  He also prescribed Predinsone (That would be 3 months on the drug.  I WON'T DO IT!)  I can't lose weight using that drug so I'm not using it.  Hopefully the antibiotic will suffice.

Took groceries home and got to rest 45 minutes before we were off again to my next appointment.  On to Downtown Orlando to get a heart monitor.  Had to wait about 45 minutes just to get the unit.  I've been there before so not much instruction needed.

Stopped at Sand Lake Hospital to pick up meds from there; next to Public to pick up meds; also stopped at the Planet Smoothie to get an energy boost. Had one more stop but I was too wiped to do it.  Called Charles and asked if he would pick up 2 Rx from Target.  He said yes and Julie took me home.  It was now 4:30ish.

What a long exhausting day.  I came home and Ween and I went to bed. Slept until 8:30, got a sandwich, took meds, and went back to bed until around 5:30 this morning.

Two visiting nurses came today - one to check on my vitals and make sure I'm doing my procedures correctly.  Another nurse came and dropped ANOTHER machine to check vitals.  I'm not sure how many times I can take the tests, read the results, write down the results and transmit the results to someone in the "nanosphere."  I love technology.

As a result of yesterday, today I ache. Every fiber of my total physical being hurts. This is usually what happens when I push myself to go on and on.

I believe I am whole.  God is still in control.

UPDATE?

And, coming to you straight from "my little corner of the couch," all is well with my soul.  My physical body is being made whole, slowly but surely.

My sugar level is normal.  My blood "Number" is 2.3, last we checked.  (2 was our goal) And, my blood pressure was 120/84.  The number they were wanting was for an infection level, I think.  They explained it all but after a while and many "glowing" lectures of what I should be or shouldn't be, should do or shouldn't do, they all sound like Charlie Brown's teacher to me. (Whaa, Whaa, Whaa, etc.)

Getting ready for my two appointments today.  Julie got the short straw and will be here soon.

Ween is coming to join me while I am "holding down the couch," and work on my blog.  Typing is not her forte, but she's great with moral support.  As I was typing, before I was "so rudely" interrupted, I'm seeing my allergist, and after that running errands, having lunch and then going to get a heart monitor that I am to wear for 2 weeks.  (Maaannn.  What they won't think of to torture me.)

Shower, clean clothes, and smelling better - all good goals for the day.

Mother's Day Again?

In just a few days "we" will be celebrating another annual Mother's Day Sunday.  As I have aged, and wisely so, I have come to believe specific days are nice, but doesn't it depend on how you treat someone all year long?


With having 2 naturally born sons, I have also "acquired" three additional "guys" who were not born of me but I was chosen as a Mother figure to them.


Bret and Julie are unbelievable.  Their "girls" are so precious.  I feel fortunate to have them in my life.  They are talented and make extremely wise decisions.  Bret is level headed, knowledgeable and capable.  Julie can do anything and usually does, all at the same time.  Kinzie has grown into a talented, capable young lady who knows who she is and uses her own mind to make decisions.  Kayla is, and will always be, the princess.  She's artistic, musical, "swirley" and so full of life.  She is a "PINK" princess who expects everyone to love her. (And they do.)


Edward came into my life by virtue of being a roommate of Tom's.  I have missed seeing him so much.  He has such talent and generosity that it is hard not to love him.  He is developing his artistic abilities and wants to go back to school to gain more knowledge in his field of expertise.


And last of all, but not least, Mock.  What can I say about him?  He's opinionated, smart mouthed, and surly at times, but he has a heart of gold and takes very good care of me. (He's also my roommate, for those of you who don't know.)  


All the guys take care of me in so many ways.  Explaining what they mean to my life is a major undertaking.  


I would be greatly amiss not to mention Wiener.  She's the only "girl" chosen by me.  Her comfort was missed while I was in the hospital.  I found myself, early one morning, petting my covers thinking it was her.  And, when we were reunited, as the doggy cartoon says, "She was so excited to see me, she didn't know whether to lick me or pee."  With her, either is possible.  She has surely been my "Saran Wrap Girl" for the last few days.  She provides comic relief and extra moral support each and every day.


All the superlatives that exist and then some are not enough to explain how I feel about my family and friends. I am truly blessed and spoiled.  If I were to live another thousand years, I would still be thanking God for the blessings of friendship and family.  Each and every day is special to me. I am truly blessed beyond what I deserve.  Thank you God.

What's the punch line?

So, I was sitting here, minding my own business, and the gate phone rang. Ween knows that means visitors so she starts barking, dancing, and jumping. She can't really dance or jump; legs too short and weighs too much, but she tries.

The person at the gate was the person from Home Healthcare.  Two hours later and so much information zipping around my brain, she asked if I had any questions.  Since I blanked out most of what she said, I told her I didn't have any questions. ( I didn't know enough to ask questions.)  I have since garnered from Mock and "the person I can't mention by name."  Mock was a EMT and the other person has been diagnosed with Diabetes and has been through this. (Great resource)

Next,  my trip to the Dr, to find out my blood count "something" or other is not high enough, so I am still on my BLOOD shots to boost my blood. Wellllllll, any idiot could know that my blood should be low in everything.  I'm a quart low according to my dip stick from all the blood letting they have done in the last two weeks.  I'm sure they are supplying the free world with my platelets.

My relative brought me home and called a little later to go to dinner.  He's so sweet.  I think he's worried about me.  He brought me ginger ale, flowers, and spent all kinds of time with me in the hospital.  I'm still expecting to be whole, and the sooner the better.

And then there is Ween's philosophy - "Sleep cures everything."  Even though it's only 6, I think we both need to go hold down the bed.  We're getting really good at that. It comes from lots of practice.

FINALLY HOME

For those of you who have been concerned and checking back and forth, I'm FINALLY HOME.  Whew.  It was a whirlwind trip.

Apparently, I was having TIAs, which I thought was for Tampa International Airport, but apparently not.  Results of the MRI revealed several small blood clots in the brain.  My Dr is concerned and has put me on Coumadin or a blood thinner.  I'm taking shots for several days.  I'll have home-health care during that time and I will be on pills after that.

There was not any clots in the cardioid area, so that's good. My sugar level is fluctuating and they're trying to get that stabilized.  My eye surgery is postponed for at least 6 months.  My physical therapy is to be rescheduled.  I go to my primary care physician tomorrow and go back to the cardiologist in one month.  He will redirect my activities at that time.  Until then, I am supposed to rest and not have any stress in my life.  (Hahahahaha) Oh, he was serious.  I will be off the prednisone by Friday and that should help with that weight gain.  I'm supposed to be on a "bland" diet.  I said "So, basically, if it tastes good, spit it out."  Pretty much!

There are some other minor issues that my doctors are working with and hopefully those will be resolved soon.

So, Ween and I are "in our position" on the couch; I guess we're resting for a while.  Thank you for all the prayers.    I will let you know if there are any changes.

WHAT LORD?

After all the events of the last few weeks, I have come to the conclusion that God is trying to tell me something. What? I'm tired of trying to guess, or doing the wrong thing. Hmmmmm?


After arriving at the hospital for my blood work today, I had another "episode" with my heart. I was rushed to ER, and after several hours of testing on me there, I was admitted to the hospital for more testing. So, here I am. Laying around with no where to go and nothing to do. Julie added Netflix to my iPad. 


I'm going to choose a movie to watch. Poor Ween. She doesn't know what has happened to her Mommy. It's hard enough for me to understand. God willing they will finish the MRI tomorrow and I can go home. I'm so tired of this. Don't I sound pitiful? Actually I'm probably better off than 3/4 of the population of Orlando. It's rough laying around, being waited on and nothing to do. Of course, being at the beach would be better but ...

Laugh or Cry?

According to 1 Corinthians 10:13 "No testing has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; He will not let you be tested beyond what you can bear. But when you are tested, He will also provide a way out so that you can endure it."
As Joyce Meyer would say, "This is just a test.  It is only a test."


The last few years, God has allowed the testing far beyond what I consider the amount I can bear.  Just one more thing; and then another, and another, and another.  And, just when I think it is over, another "THING" happens. And, yet, He sends someone or something we need to take care of that "THING."


The last few weeks have been so emotional, as I have said.  This week another set of "things" are cropping up.  Today was supposed to be, what I have come to call, a DOWN or Rest day.  Mock had appts starting with a 10:00 blood work test.  I woke him; he got dressed; left the apartment and came back within a minute stating the car battery was dead.  


I just had the car serviced.  Why wasn't that found?  Another "thing" to deal with.  None of the men in the apartment office have jumper cables (Interesting, huh?)  I called "the relative I can't mention," and he came all the way here from work, jumped the car, and went to pick up the prescription for my blood work to be done tomorrow before the MRI. (He must love me.) 


The Dr's offices is telling me that a blood test is not necessary to do an MRI. The hospital is telling me that they require a blood test before MRIs. (Interesting, huh?) The hospital sent a request for a RX for blood work. And, had not received the information from the Dr's office.  I asked the Dr's office to fax a copy to the hospital; even gave them the number to fax; it was also included on the request. I didn't want to take any chances, so "He" picked up the Rx for me so that we will have it tomorrow.


At O:dark:30 tomorrow, I am to be at the hospital for blood work before the MRI.  Interesting, if not enjoyable.

"YO YO" OR ROLLERCOASTER?

Emotions are tricky.  The last few weeks have been all over the "physical" and "mental" map of my life.  My eye surgery has been put on hold.  When my cardiologist told me that, it was all I could do to hold it together until I got to the car.  He will not "sign off" on my eye surgery until he finds out what is happening with my heart;  Me and my big mouth.  I guess I shouldn't have told the opthomologist's office about the heart problem.

As I reached for the keys to start the car, the thought "My Life Is In Your Hands" came to mind.  I went to I-tunes to find a copy of an old song I knew as a child.  I didn't find that one but found a new one by the same name recorded by Brooklyn Tabernacle Choir:

You don't have to worry; And don't you be afraid

Joy comes in the morning; Troubles they don't last always

For there's a friend in Jesus; who will wipe the tears away
And, if your heart is broken;  just lift your hands and say 

Oh I know that I can make it; I know that I can stand;
No matter what,   may come my way; My life is in your hands.

You don't have to worry; And don't you be afraid

Joy comes in the morning; Troubles they don't last always

For there's a friend in Jesus; who will wipe the tears away

And, if your heart is broken;  just lift your hands and say 

Oh I know that I can make it; I know that I can stand;

No matter what,   may come my way; My life is in your hands.

When your tests and trials, they seem to get you down

And all your friends and loved ones;  are nowhere to be found

Remember there's a friend in Jesus; who will wipe the tears away

And, if your heart is broken;  just lift your hands and say 

Oh I know that I can make it; I know that I can stand;

No matter what,   may come my way;  My life is in your hands.

You don't have to worry; And don't you be afraid

Joy comes in the morning; Troubles they don't last always

My life is in your hand.

Enough said!

Piece of cake

One Dr down and 2 more to go.  My opthomologist has scheduled cataract surgery on my right eye on May 16 at 7:00 am.  That time is just WRONG.  Not only am I going to feeling yucky, but I'm also going to be hungry and sleepy.  I know there is a law somewhere against early morning hours. (Sounds like naming Snow White's dwarfs - Yucky, Hungry, Sleepy...)


I am having an early "breakfast" tomorrow with some friends. We meet about every month just to get reacquainted.  We all have worked together at some or other and really enjoy catching up on all the stuff each one is doing.


After breakfast I go to see my cardiologist.  Mock is taking me as my eye doctor has "recommended" that I not drive a lot until after surgery, especially at night.  So, I'm pretty much stuck at the mercy of friends and family.  


The person I can't mention took me to the Dr. today as they dilated my pupils.  It was about 9:30 am, and it didn't start wearing off until around 4.  Good thing he was with me.  He even bought me lunch at Sweet Tomatoes.


While I was getting my eyes checked, we dropped off the car to have it serviced.  It only needed $1,000 worth of work done.  When I stated my surprise to the mechanic, he said I was getting a rebate of $100.  I said the only way I could get it done was getting a rebate of $1,000.  He laughed.  At least he has a sense of humor.


Ween had such a hard day, she has to take a nap.  I tell you eating, pooping and looking cute is a hard job, but somebody has to do it.

Here we go again

Wouldn't it be nice if we got paid, by the hour, for the time we spend in Dr's waiting rooms.  Man would I be rich.  Once again this week, I'm doing the Dr thing.  Monday - Optometrist; Tuesday - Pulmonary; Wednesday - Cardiologist.  The relative I'm not supposed to mention is taking me to the appt tomorrow as they dilate the pupils and it is not a good idea for me to drive afterward.

Mock is taking me Tuesday after breakfast with "The Motley Crue" at Cracker Barrel.  Don't know about Wednesday yet.  I haven't been able to talk anyone into taking me.  I hate having to depend on someone else to take me places. It's been suggested that I NOT drive as I'm still experiencing a type of vertigo and my vision is still "suspect" as to sharpness of being able to see.

I had to reschedule my appointments at Mayo as I just couldn't drive there, physically.  They have rescheduled for June.  Long time.  We'll see how things go.

I am scheduled to start therapy, that's physical not mental, on May 9.  I can't wait to go.  It will be at Celebration Hospital and they have a pool.  I really NEED to exercise.  We'll see how my heart does with this; hopefully it will happen.

Ween and I are "holding down the couch" again today.  I didn't get to go to church for several reason, and I miss not being able to go.  Hopefully I will be COMPLETELY WHOLE soon and I can get back to "DOING" and not just sitting around.  I am thanking God for making me whole.  I can't wait to get started on my "projects."

MY GREAT GOD

Bless the Lord, Oh my soul, and all that is within me bless His Holy name.


Bless the Lord, Oh my soul, and all that is within me bless His Holy name.


He has done great things.  He has done great things.  


He has done great things.  Bless His Holy name.

Things

Throughout my life, there have been many things that I have experienced. While I was pondering this day, I said to myself, "Self-there are some things I NEVER want to do again." I began to re-form that list in my head.

I NEVER WANT TO:

1.   ride a roller coaster.

2.   use a bathroom in Tijuana, Mexico.

3.   eat or drink something I don't know what it is.

4.   go on a hay ride.

5.   drive through Georgia.

6.   have another surgery.

7.   wear high heel shoes.

8.    buy another outfit because a friend says it looks good on me.

9.    visit the "museum" at Cedar Key.

10.   buy another car that is NOT a convertible.

Ten are enough for now, but obviously there are more.  Stay tuned.

Not Today

Sometimes it seems, I think, in my blogs that I am lackadaisical about my life especially with my health or, money or most anything I ramble on about. Usually not so.  I do a "stream of consciousness" writing - whatever pops into my mind at the moment goes on the page.  That is not to say I don't do anything about circumstances or do not have moments of lucidity where I can actually know what is going on and what to do.  DOES THAT MAKE SENSE? I'm not sure.

Some have expressed concern about me.  I covet prayers - always.  I truly want guidance from God.  And, I NEVER want to forget His goodness.  But I HONESTLY don't worry about anything.  I have some concerns.  I seek wisdom.  I also seek mercy and grace.

We have a fairly good relationship - God and me.  He knows me.  He speaks to me.  I TRY to listen carefully. I used to say to Tom that I was the "balloons" the clown in "my Circus" was carrying and he was the clown holding onto the strings.  (We all know what happens if you let go of the string.)  I do have a tendency to fly around the room backwar, but not without God holdling onto the balloons.

I am in ALMOST constant contact with my doctors.  I have been to four or five this week.  I had a new "stress" test and multiple blood tests.  (I thought I had enough stress in my life.)  My C-pap machine has been changed to a newer and better one; I AM RESTING,  as I was told.  I'm not to have stress in my life right now.  (I told Dr Alabi that if I had any less stress I would be catatonic.)  Medicines have been regulated.  And, I am in the process of having additional testing for my heart.

They have determined that something isn't working correctly with the pumping of the blood flow.  Ween is taking good care of me and we are "holding down the couch" as much as possible.

Please continue the prayers.  Don't be too concerned.  I will keep you posted as to any changes.  I have decided whatever happens is a WIN/WIN situation. And, God is in control.

Garbage v Who I Am

Getting through all the garbage to WHOLENESS is like swimming in mousse (chocolate of course.) I don't know whether to paddle or start licking. Either one can get me into a mess.

I was to go to the local elementary school this week to help with testing. I went on Monday. Sat for 2 hrs and came home. Totally unnecessary as the teacher likes to have TOTAL control of her classroom. I would have loved to have been that organized, but it didn't happen for me.

I had a weird day, physically in that I sweated almost the whole time. I couldn't figure out what was wrong. Being exhausted, after I got home I slept until about 6pm. Getting something to eat was an effort, so I went back to sleep for the night. The next day, after getting ready I had some sort of "EPISODE" where I had the vertigo again and could not stand up. I thought it was some sort of seizure but Mock said it was a small stroke. I couldn't go to the school nor anywhere else for that matter. I was nauseated, had a strange "pulling" sensation in my right side (neck and arm) and had trouble talking. Mock said I slurred my words but I didn't hear that.

Again today I could not go to the school.  I am still feeling the vertigo and nausea.  I had felt so good for so long that I thought I could actually do something to help.  I hate that I couldn't work it out, and am embarrassed that I couldn't. I hope they are as understanding as they seem.

The garbage I am having to get through to WHOLENESS is interesting. God knows what it will take to get to TOTAL renewal.  Thank you God.

D-DAY

Classroom testing, in my opinion, is wasted time and gives you meaningless information.  With all things being even, which they aren't, it MIGHT be helpful to know where to start with sharing information for children to learn.  That would be helpful not the wanted end result.  Tests have a tendency to tell you what a person DOESN'T know, not what they DO know.

ALL PEOPLE ARE DIFFERENT WITH DIFFERENT EXPERIENCES, AND LEARN AT DIFFERENT RATES.

With that in mind, I have volunteered to proctor at my local elementary school for the FCAT, which starts today.  Interesting, if not enjoyable.  I don't know if I'm ready to be back in a classroom setting or not.  We'll see.  I haven't been there before today so I this is a new experience for me.  It's like my first day of school.  Wow.  I hope I can find the bathroom.

Summers

The summers were more exciting than the regular school year.  I liked school, don't get me wrong.  I still do.  I love reading, learning, and finding out what I DON'T know.  (There is so much)  Summer was different.  The wake-up time wasn't as early.  My mother still made sure I didn't sleep.  It must have been something in her childhood that made her think that sleeping late was a sin or close to it.  She always had some sort of NOISE factor that would wake me about 8 every morning.  My truly favorite was the washing machine. Why, pray tell, did the washing have to be done on Saturday?  My mother was a "stay at home" Mother and could have washed any time during the week. But, Nooooooooooooooo.  It had to be on Saturday at O:dark 30.

I slept on the second floor.  The washing machine was in the basement three floors away.  How she managed to get that machine loud enough to wake me, I'll never know.  I just know that as an adult, I am very considerate of when I wash my clothes. And, I hate being awaken by loud noises.

Another favorite noise was the tree trimmers.  That was also done at the crack of "chickens waking" on Saturday.  I could never figure that out during my twelve summers of being out of school. (The chickens were annoyed too.)

The important part of Summer was that I got to go to Vacation Bible School at all the different churches in the tiny berg where I lived.  My mother didn't realize that I actually liked going.  What could be better than learning about Jesus, making crafts, eating snacks, seeing friends socially, and not having to do work at the house.    (The Baptist church had the best snacks.)

I also got to wander about in the wooded areas that were there.  I'd climb the hill close to our house; sit on the side and look all around the area.  An aerial view is totally different from ground level views. Big things don't seem as intimidating up there.  And the things you could find - arrowheads, "golden rocks," footprints, each thing was an adventure.

There comes a time when you have to stop going to Vacation Bible School, quit the adventures in the woods, and become an adult.  It's really a shame.  I remember that girl.  She actually enjoyed life.  Poor thing.  She didn't know any better.  I wonder what became of her.

Whole or Healed

Being WHOLE can be compared to the Jewish term "SHALOM."   

(Hebrew word meaning peace, completeness, and welfare and can be used idiomatically to mean both hello and goodbye.  As it does in English, it can refer to either peace between two entities (especially between man and God or between two countries), or to the well-being, welfare or safety of an individual or a group of individuals.)

"Shalom" is usually used for the TOTAL aspect of a life.  That is also what the term "WHOLE" means.  Spiritual, Mental, Physical, Financial; whatever is involved in the "Total Person" is included in being WHOLE.  

Being "HEALED" deals with a process.  Where to start?  What to include?  How to accomplish this goal? I have asked for WHOLENESS. I no longer want to just be healed. I want to be WHOLE!  As a child of the Most High God, this is possible.  

I am asking my "ABBA" Father for WHOLENESS.  I am heir to the Kingdom of God.  He loves me and is in control.  I AM WHOLE!

Ode to Ween

When there is no one to turn to - Ween is there
When I need a partner in crime - Ween is there
When there is a need for someone to help finish my meal - Ween is there
Give me a W; Give me an E; Give me another E; Give me an N
What is the sweetest word I hear - WEEN; WEEN; WEEN.


She is playing my "Saran Wrap" lovie.  She hasn't been more than 18 inches from me since I can came home.  She knows when I am sad and puts her head on my lap; when I hurt, she licks where I hurt without being told; she is kind; she is loving; she doesn't ask for much.  She even forgives when I forget to feed and water her.  How much more can you ask from a companion.  It's true.  The more I learn about men, the more I love my dog.

The Week From ?

The week was not the worst of my life, but it was right up there in the top twenty of all rotten times.  I had 4 days of testing due and ending the week in Jacksonville with April 7 being noted.  Everyone knows the saying goes, "Best Laid Plans of Mice and Men often go astray."

Monday was to be a rest day from the "crazy" cruise and visit to EPCOT, etc. That was blown when I discovered I needed to do about a "Gadzillion" errands before I had to leave - pick up a prescription, dog food at the health food store, allergy shots, and the list goes on.

Tuesday tests from the neurologist.  I was there early, made to wait for testing - 45 minutes of listening to the receptionist and the "tester" person eject the Spanish language about a guy that neither one liked, but he was fun sometimes. The actual test took about 20 minutes. Diagnosis was carpal tunnel in both hands, pinched nerve in the neck, and an extreme deficiency of B12. Now I had another errand to get the sublingual B12 tablets.  (It took several stops to find them.)

More errands, wash clothes, drop off Ween to Bob, report to Celebration Hospital for a sleep study.  I had to sleep on my back, which I don't do well, so needless to say, I didn't rest well.  "Escaped" around 5:30, ran home and tried to wash the "glue" out of my hair, dressed for trip to Pasco for the eye specialist.  Also had to pack for the next 4 days as I was going to JAX after St Lukes test.

It took 2 hrs to get to St Lukes, traffic was horrendous on Hillsborough. Arrived around 9:30 for a 10:00 appointment.  After 5 minutes with ear specialist, he said he couldn't test me as I had said "Yes" to one of the questions and it was against the law for him to test me if I answered Yes to any of the questions on the paper I filled out.  Soooooooooooooo, it's 10:05 and my next appointment was 11:00.  After waiting until 11:30, one of the people there dilated my pupils again (which they said they were not going to do) and looked at my pupils again.  I had to wait to see the other doctor.  At 12:30 I decided I was too tired and too sick to deal with these people any more.  I told the receptionist that I had to leave. As I had not eaten all day, I called Vicki and met her at A & W Root Beer to get a hot dog, which sounded wonderful.  She had the girls, but it was great to see them.

My pupils were finally somewhat recovered and I decided to go home.  Called MAYO cancelled my appts and text Aida I wasn't coming.  After almost 2 1/2 hrs of gruelling traffic - wrecks all over I-275 and I-4 in Tampa.  Traffic was backed up over the Howard Franklin South, and way past entrance to I-4 to the North.  What a mess.  I took a "short cut" around Tampa and it only took about 45 minutes.  Outside of Tampa, traffic cleared and I made it to Bob's to pick up Ween in about 1 hr.

Ween and I were so happy to see each other, I went straight home and we both went to bed snuggling.  Thank God I have her.  She is so much company.

We went to Sonny's with Julie and Bret and girls Friday night.  I got sick and haven't felt well since. The last few times I've gone to Sonny's I've gotten sick.  I must eat too much.

My vision isn't good right now.  I don't know what makes the difference but I'm having trouble driving and watching TV.  Even typing this blog, I'm having trouble reading what I'm typing.  It's a good thing I have a spell checker and can touch type.

I don't know what is wrong.  I don't know what needs to be done, but I'm done testing.  I can't do this any more.  God has to do something.

Interesting If Not Enjoyable

Ten years ago I came a home from church and found my husband of 35 years dead on our bedroom floor. I knew my life would change, but I didn't realize how much.

During this time, I've made good choices and some not so good. It has certainly been interesting. In talking with Tom this week he made the statement that it seemed like another lifetime.

 In some ways it was another me and another place and time. In some ways I am not the person I used to be. I can only speculate Who I would have been. Certainly not remarried or maybe not even in Orlando, only God knows for sure. If God lets me live another 10 years, I'm sure that time will also "INTESTING, IF NOT ENJOYABLE.". (That was one of my favorite Tomisms.)

If It's Tuesday It Must Be Orlando

Two more days until my "AMA MARATHON."  Resting last week on the cruise was great but hitting the road running is the agenda for next week.

TUESDAY is my neurologist's testing.  I've been told to allow 2 hrs for this testing.  I also have to squeeze shopping, a haircut, laundry from the trip, take Ween to have her groomed, and anything else that needs to be done before I leave.

WEDNESDAY is getting Ween to Bob, who is supposed to be taking care of her while I am gone.  I would prefer taking her, but I can't figure out a way to do that.  A third sleep study test is on the agenda, but I don't have to be there before 8:00 pm.  My pulmonary doctor thinks my Bi-Pap machine needs to be adjusted.  It will also be my "cleanup" day to leave the apartment in good shape before I leave.

THURSDAY I'm in Pasco County having eye and ear testing.  St Lukes is one of the foremost eye clinics in the world.  Dr Gills has been on the "cutting edge" (no pun intended) of cataract surgery for the last 20 or 30 years.  My optometrist did not like what he saw on the last visit so he's doing further testing.  They also give hearing tests which is convenient as I actually do need to have one done. Killing two birds with one stone as the saying goes. Right now I'm planning to stay in Pasco with either Vicki or Kali, not sure which.  Kali wants to go to JAX so I may stay there and leave for Mayo early the next morning.  Plans are still up in the air for now.  It's a good thing I'm flexible.

FRIDAY a trip to JAX to Mayo.  I'm seeing my orthopedic doctor and bariatric nutritionist.  I don't look forward to seeing my nutritionist.  She has a soft voice but "chews me out" in a nice way. Having trouble with my back necessitates seeing the orthopedic doctor. It's not the bone spur that is the problem now, it's the other side and my spine.  If Kali goes, we'll probably stay on the beach.  If not, I'll stay with Aida and her kids; Always a great time.

SATURDAY is the 10th anniversary of Tom's death.  I always "hide out" on this day.  JAX beach is a great place to get lost.

That's my schedule.  If they can't find anything this time, I'm done.  I'm tired of the testing and the term "Well, it could be ..." I'll just tag myself a hypochondriac and be done with it. I'll have to come home to rest with Ween as my faithful companion.

What do I know

Welcoming Banner

THE FANTASY

Traveling is one of my favorite things to do, and when I get to travel with "the relative I can't mention," it is always first class and more.  This ship is named THE FANTASY, and it pretty much is just that-A real fantasy time.  Anything, and Everything.

Chandelier in Rotunda

The Boss and Me

If you are a cruiser, then Disney is the only way to sail.  Lush facilities, wonderful scrumptious food, music, activities for all ages, and an adult area if you don't feel the need to have children as part of your agenda.

Lunch at Enchanted Gardens

Disney is noted for their shows and fireworks at the parks, but the ship has not been left out-elaborate entertainment every night, with a full-blown fireworks show off the aft end.  Such amazing sites are available.

Welcome Drink

Having enough food on this cruise is not a problem either.  I ate at the Royal Court Restaurant for breakfast the second morning-Ham and cheese omelet, croissant, sausages, coffee, juice and a cappuccino to add to the experience.  There was so much to choose from it was hard to decide.  "How many different types of muffins, filled pastries, donuts, breads, can you possibly have?"  If you don't see it, ask for it and they probably have it available.

Room service menu is minimal, but they will fix ANYTHING they have if you want it.  I did a continental breakfast one morning, and a cheeseburger for lunch one day, but pretty much ate everything else in the restaurants.  First night was Royal Court and I ordered a duck appetizer, french onion soup, braised lamb with au gratin potatoes, green beans, and creme brulee for desert.  I also tasted someones escargot, and it was De licious.  Art decided I need my own experience so he ordered one for me.  I was so full I WADDLED out the door and moaned for several hours afterward.

Animator's Palate Show

Next night was Animator's Palate.  Wonderful breads and dips, appetizer trio with shrimp, ahi tuna, and prosciutto on a rectangular plate, popcorn soup that was the consistency of she crab soup only without the sherry with a small container of carmel corn to add to the soup, a type of "johnny cake" that they called cornbread, also a lobster entree with a green bean veggies , venison slices with purple slaw, dessert trio of cheesecake, banana creme brulee, and strawberry shortcake.  These were in small individual bowls on a rectangular dish similar to the appetizer.

Enchanted Garden was the last night. I had a chicken breast and a baked potato.  I was so full from overeating each day, I could only manage half of that.  Like I said, more food than you can imagine.

Castaway Cay

I've pretty much decided I'm not a cruiser.  My bathroom at home is decidedly larger.  I don't have to travel AFT or FORWARD for a mile outside my bedroom to get anywhere I want to be. And, I can raid my refrigerator when I want some snacky stuff. (Not necessary on ship) But most of all - my "FOOT WARMER" can also serve as a "face washer" all in one package.

It's not possible to remember everything even with notes, but this is a slight overview of the 4 days.  I was soooo glad to get home and so was my "saran wrap" dog.  I think she missed me.  I haven't told her about being gone next week.  We'll just surprise her.

THIS IS 'JUST' A TEST

Falling out of the shower wasn't exactly my idea of how to start the day, but too much soap can actually cause you to slip.  DUH!  Anyway, I don't think anything was damaged.

"The person I'm not supposed to mention" took me to St Luke's Eye Clinic in Tarpon Springs on Friday.  We were there 4 hrs.  I thought they would NEVER get finished.  I knew they were going to dilate my pupils, that is why HE went.  But twice?  I found out a few things - Cataracts, on both eyes; no big deal.  The Doctor also discovered I have the beginning of Macular Degeneration.  AND, I need new glasses.  Whew.  He also didn't like what he saw on the lining of my eye.  I have to go back for more testing.  I DID get to have a quick lunch with Vicki, one of my friends in New Port Richey.

Being in church yesterday was a real treat.  I haven't been able to attend for a long time. We are between pastors, but it sounds like they are ready to decide-four men are being considered.  The youth minister spoke and did a nice job.

The Elders search for a potential pastor and narrow it down to several people.  The Elders are the ones who decide.  The congregation doesn't actually have much to say about who is selected. This is different than I've experienced.  My former churches decided by letting the congregation hear each candidate.  (Usually about 3 or 4)  Then the congregation votes, with the district superintendent having the final say.

This past week was better physically for me; not much pain-feeling better than I have been for a very lonnnnng time.  I didn't have to take naps to keep up the energy and get rid of the aches.  I don't know why; maybe the new meds they are giving me actually "kicked in."   I've gotten some work done here at home.  For whatever reason, I'm grateful.  I really don't know how bad I feel until the pain is gone.

Today was the first day of a set of three tests with "nuclear" medicine.  My "relative I can't mention" took me.  All my guys and friends have been awesome.  "He" had to drive back. I had a "slight" reaction to the shot; nausea, aching, and upset stomach.  I was there almost 1 1/2 hrs, for a ten-minute procedure.  Getting ready was the biggest part. Tomorrow and Wed, the "scans" will take about an hr each.  It is supposed to reveal any abnormalities in my body - tumor, infection, whatever.  Wonder what it will show in my brain?

The technician said I should stay away from the dog.  She says that it is recommended not to be close to babies or animals.  Ween is not happy about me not petting her.  Wait until she finds out she can't sleep on the bed tonight.  She will NOT be a happy camper.

Friday I  am supposed to go to MAYO in Jax.  This is the first time since December.  I'm taking paperwork to see if I can get a "charity" notation so that I can HOPEFULLY have my surgery in Jax.  The surgery is on hold anyway because of my heart and lung problems. Who knows?  I just try to take one day at a time.

Resting on the couch and starting to feel better.  I have to eat light because of the tests. I'm marinading chicken and will bake it.  That should be okay.  God is good.

D I V O R C E

Divorce is a travesty to God's plan and yet I am once again faced with the decision to do just that.  I gave Bob "preliminary" divorce papers for some information that needed to be filled out on the pages before it is filed.  He didn't seem surprised.  He's hard to read at times so I don't know exactly how he feels but he filled in the blanks and handed it back to me.

Yesterday was our 5th anniversary.  (Happy Anniversary)  We've been separated almost 3 years.  In order for me to not feel in limbo, I  think this is the next step in our relationship.  I really don't know whether he doesn't want to be married or he just doesn't want to be married to me.  He will not discuss anything with me.

Where does that leave me now?  Pretty much just as I have been yet I won't be married.  I pray this is the right decision.  I don't know what else to do.

One upper that I have to look forward to in the near future is the cruise on THE FANTASY. WAHOO!!!

I AM BLESSED

"The relative I'm not supposed to mention" just text me and asked if I wanted to go on the new Disney Ship, The Fantasy, for the maiden voyage.  DUH!  

Lobby of THE DREAM

I was privileged to go on the maiden voyage of the last ship, The Dream, and it was fantastic.  I can't wait to see the new one the last of the month.

REMEMBERING

Loss of a loved one can be devastating for someone.  The loss of a celebrity affects everyone.  Whitney Houston, Davy Jones, and Robert Sherman are three people who have recently died.  Robert Sherman is probably the least know of the three.  He and his brother Richard wrote so many songs and shows for Disney, I can only begin to list them.  Mary Poppins,  Jungle Book, The Aristocats, and the list goes on and on.

Whitney Houston was every one's favorite darling- songs, movies, directing; so much talent and gone entirely too soon.  I did not have the pleasure of seeing her in person, but enjoying her music was a past time for me.  The nation mourns with her family.


But Davy Jones was someone I had seen in concert many times.  He usually came for Disney's FLOWER AND GARDEN SHOW in the Spring.  He was a true showman.  These pictures were from his 2009 show.  Cute, personable, talented.  I enjoyed all his concerts.  Saying goodbye is always hard, for any reason. Not only will his family miss him, our world will miss him and his music, for music makes the world go around and lightens your heart. His did both.

FOOTNOTE:
Just found out that for Flower and Garden Davy's former partner in the Monkeys, Mickey Dolenz, will be taking Davy's place.  This will be a great way to honor Davy.

Change?

Over the years, I have had many, many "Charles" in my life.  Starting with my brother Charles, dated 3 or 4 Charles, engaged to a Charles, named my natural born son Charles, and my roommate Charles.

My backyard

Today is Charles Pugh's birthday (former engaged person).  Why have I remembered this date for over 40 years - I REALLY don't know for sure.  It's just one of those unimportant facts I have stored in my memory chip for a brain. Wouldn't it be nice to be able to change memory chips as easily as you can change SIM cards?  I would be sooooo smart and up to date on all my facts.  This could be a project for the Cupertino area of the world.

Yesterday I went to my pulmonary specialist.  My breathing capacity has gone down from February's test.  I asked what that meant and he said it meant I wasn't breathing well.  WELL, DUH! That's why I'm going to him in the first place.  So, I'm in for another round of testing with him.  I wonder - is there a limit to the number of tests a body can stand?  I bet I reached my limit a looooooooonnnnnnnnng time ago.  Oh well. Here we go again.  (I have a blood test tomorrow.  I hope I pass.  I better go study for it.)

Quiet Is Good

So far this week, it has been quiet in my corner of the world.  I only have one doctor's appointment and a blood test.  No doctors for Mock.  (Whew)

Ween is sleeping after a mid-morning breakfast of Doggie Food and licking my yogurt container.  I've decided not to feed her anything connected with "People Food."

We have been walking as much as possible, which is not far for me but we're building time and distance each day.

Yesterday was an exceptional day for me.  I went "shopping" for clothes; alone.  I DID have Barb on speed dial, just in case.  We figured out that I had not had any new clothes since she was down here the last time, which was over a year, maybe two.  I know "holes" in your jeans is again the "in" thing, but it's not my "in thing."  I finally found 3 pair of pants at Kohls and immediately quit.  That is more shopping than I want to do at any time.  I also had my allergy shots, did some grocery shopping, picked up some "drugs" from Target, and went to Honey Baked to purchase some Ham.

One of the problems with feeling good is that I try to make up for time lost and I usually feel bad the next day.  Today is an okay day.  Maybe I'm finally coming out of this "unhealthy" era I have been in for a while.  I certainly hope so. In any case, God is still good and in control.  I'm thankful for that.