The Basic Needs of Life

When I was a Kindergarten teacher, the curriculum that was used in the system where I taught, said that there are four basic things we "NEED" in life - food, clothing, shelter, and water. One of my very wise students corrected me in class the day I was teaching that concept and added that we also need another thing - love. She was so right. Without love, we can't even begin to try to grasp the concept of what it means to accept or understand others.

According to Kay Arthur, noted speaker and writer, unconditional love is not often given and is extremely hard to find. I have known "unconditional love" from two living things on this earth - Tom, my first husband, and Carson, our family's beloved pet.

I just had a call from my son and Carson has slipped into the realm we know as death. I can't tell you how much hurt that gives me. Once again, I have to reach out to God for strength to get through this. I can barely see the computer screen as I try to write about feelings that have been with me too many times in the last 7 years.

My dad died in 2000; my husband in 2002, my mother in 2003, and now Carson in 2007. The pain of loss has covered me so intensely that breathing is difficult at times.

As memories crowd in, I especially remember one time Carson was with me soon after I had remodeled my house. Even as a very young puppy, Carson had a habit of taking in a full mouth of dried dog food, running to the living room and depositing it on the carpet just so he could eat one piece at a time. My son said it was because the bowl was always in the kitchen area. In order to eat when Tom had a party, Carson would bring his own food to the "party area" as he was not allowed to have "people food."

Shortly after the removal of carpet and the replacement of tile all over my house, Carson came to visit for a few days. Being a creature of habit, at dinner time, Carson grabbed a large mouthful of dried food, turned around to take it to the carpet, and realized there was no carpet to be seen ANYWHERE. His expression was priceless. It was what I call "The deer in headlights" look, one of panic and wide-eyed discovery. You could almost "hear" the wheels moving to trying to figure out what to do.

After a few seconds of disbelief and indecision, he noticed an area rug in the family room, ran over to it and "spit" the food out. After breathing a few "sighs" of relief, he turned around and looked at me with the expression of "How could you do that to me." I nearly fell down laughing he looked so funny.

Even though I don't feel much like laughing now, I know I will always have a smile when I remember his antics and the expressions of his face. And so, as I end this oh so painful diatribe, I must say I am thankful to have had, at least for a little while, someone who loved me "unconditionally."