Platitudes are aggravating and frustrating to me, especially when someone regurgitates the very advice that I already know, but choose to ignore. I have long thought most of the information that I have "stored" in my ever decreasing memory is mostly "useless knowledge" except if I wanted to go on Jeopardy, or a similar situation. And yet, I used the very same "wisdom" with someone else this week.
I awoke very early this am and was struck with the thought that I had thrown out a piece of advice for a friend as if I actually knew what I was saying. Pompous isn't it? That I would actually have a solution for another person's problems is hubris at the very least, ignoring the person entirely. Those of us who know things, tend to do this occasionally. Why do I do this?
My "high school history teacher", Victor Asseff, once told me, "You will either grow up to be an advice columnist or a psychologist. You like to dissect "why" for someone, go about delving into their lives, and then explaining the reason to them. Eureka. I have the answer." He called it some sort of syndrome. I am older and supposedly wiser, yet I still have a penchant for doing exactly that.
Why? I really don't know. I actually think I'm helping someone, at the time. Even as the words "jump off the page" or come rolling out of my mouth, they sometimes sound ridiculous to me. Will I never learn? It is much easier to keep quiet, than to try to remove the foot from my mouth. Either way, I'm always sorry. I'm glad God forgives me even if the other person doesn't. I AM getting better - at least I recognize that I have a problem now.
1 comment:
So you threw "advice" to someone...And you are saying it wasn't received well or at all? Not your problem....No apology needed.
But it hurts when our sincere efforts aren't appreciated, especially when we are hit broadside or are in a vulnerable place ourselves.
No doubt the other party knows what you said is right, but they aren't in a "receiving place." Think of your comments as seed-planting. It will take awhile for your comment to grow on them.
Guess who taught me? Tom Stovall!!
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